tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26512527340912932792024-03-05T14:35:22.383-08:00BusyBliss: Finding the Joy in the Midst of Motherly MayhemMindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-19796673769936325492018-02-04T19:29:00.001-08:002018-02-04T19:29:25.219-08:00Bye, Bye to Busy Bliss for nowI needed this reminder, so I'm reposting a post from 3 kids ago... now I have 6 little dears under 8, whew! I can't believe how little they are in these pictures! Makes me want to soak them up tomorrow.<br />
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<b>"Time is precious. And so are these little dears. This is just not my season to have a blog like this :).</b> <b> It's causing me to be way too "busy" and stressed ironically. Motherhood is sacrifice. It is work (whew, is it work!), but it is the GREATEST WORK on earth!</b> What a great adventure it has been to have a voice for mothers who deeply desire to be intentional and to thrive in this most challenging, most paramount work! I will forever cherish all the comments and the wonderful women I've meet through this blog.<br />
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With three kids three and under, I need less distractions (even the really good things) and more MOMENTS to focus on THEM. This is my greatest life's work and I don't want to miss it!<br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #38761d; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">I'll be posting from time to time to update with pictures, but I leave you with my conviction that:</span></b><br />
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<b>The greatest gift you can give your children is YOU. If you're human than you're going to have really hard moments (even to the point of tears) but I believe that mothers can learn and grow and TRY AGAIN every day. We truly have the most influential job on earth. Choosing to have daily moments of teaching and connecting will be our greatest investment! I hope we all can find JOY and our desperate need for CHRIST in the midst of all our motherly mayhem.</b><br />
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Maybe there'll be another season for me to spread my feelings through writing. But here's the little dears that need MORE of me. And Steve that includes you too babes :). "<br />
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And here's my favorite video that reminds me what matters most.</div>
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Much Love,</div>
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Mindy<br />
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-60324124933501665022017-05-03T10:40:00.003-07:002017-05-05T08:38:12.911-07:00Homeschool Language Arts Review: Handwriting Without Tears, All About Reading, All About Spelling, The Good and the Beautiful, Sonlight, and Create a Story board game<b>Does homeschool have to have a language arts curriculum?! It's nice to have a plan and not feeling like some component is missing. But sometimes I just wonder! </b> I do like that curriculums keep things rolling when I haven't planned anything or we're waiting to run to the library to stock up. But<b> </b>I also cherished the days early on when they were already reading well and I felt like we could just EXPLORE the best children's books and naturally teach them things and do crafts and fun activities along the journey. <b>PLAY is powerful</b> and seems to invite the very deepest learning and memories. We plow through our favorite curriculums still that are special to us, but I just have to hold on to the dearest moments too... All four buddies crowded in a long cardboard "Boxcar" dotted with smushed blueberries as we read and act out "The Boxcar Children" or exploring the moon through a telescope or carving Oreos to look like moon phases as we pour over "Harold and the Purple Crayon." Or talking about spelling and grammar rules naturally as they write about their favorite ocean animals before we venture off to the aquarium. Or eating donuts while we read "Charlotte's Web" and discovering cool spider webs at the park. THESE are my favorite most precious moments of Mommy School. But then there's also the looming "Are they getting everything they need? What am I missing?" qualms. So, I'm grateful for wonderful curriculums all prepared and planned out already like "The Good and the Beautiful"! The first page of our "All About Spelling" manual has my very FAVORITE QUOTE:<br />
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<b>The Author of AAS curriculum says, "To my mom, who gave me the love of words and knowledge. My mom provided a childhood for me filled with reading, studying, writing, and dreaming. I will never forget the wonder of a parcel of books delivered to our door one winter day, and my brother and sister and me draping ourselves over my mom while she read to us on the couch. As my mom's voice carried us along, the afternoon was transformed from dull and overcast to enchanting and unforgettable. It was soon after that I felt a determination to learn to put words on paper, and asked for a pencil..."</b><br />
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LOVE, LOVE, LOVE <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Handwriting Without Tears</b></span>. I highly recommend it - all the different levels. The Pre-K materials are AWESOME too... chalkboard to do "wet, dry, try" with letters, a mat with wooden shapes to BUILD a letter in the correct order, and really fun workbooks to reinforce everything. And their simple double-lined paper that goes with it is genius! Handwriting is probably all 3 of my kids favorite subject just because of this curriculum. <br />
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Here's some examples of Handwriting Without Tears paper. And these stories were inspired from "Create a Story" board game (below)</div>
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And that reminds me... the BEST for illustrating stories ... <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Usborne Step by Step Drawing Books</b></span>!!!!<br />
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So we tried <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b>All About Reading</b></span> (Primer, Levels 1 & 3) and <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b>All About Spelling</b></span> (Levels 1 & 2) for a semester and liked it but didn't love it. AAR was too much busy work for us. I personally love being able to choose our OWN books and let them pick to read what they are really interested in rather than what they have to. I think reading can be taught more naturally. AAS was great with all the phonics and sounds cards and the "key cards" which have the spelling rules. I learned so much as a parent about our english language and feel much more confident in teaching my kids now. For me, AAS spelling was enough and I didn't really need AAR. My kids weren't really into as much either. I may get the AAS Levels 3&4 books just to teach ME the concepts so I can better teach them. My preschooler loved the "Ziggy" puppet for the primer level, but I'd rather just do my own fun things for teaching letter sounds than using a curriculum. <br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">(Thanks google images for this picture since I don't have time to snap one ha!)</span></div>
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What my kids really LOVED was <span style="color: #8e7cc3;"><b><span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;"><u>F.I.A.R "Five in a Row"</u></span></b> </span>where you explore wonderful children's picture books for "5 days" or whatever and do lots of different activities with each one exploring things like science, language arts, character qualities, art, history. I bought the manuals but they are pricey. You can also reference lots of ideas on <a href="http://www.delightfullearning.net/p/five-in-row.html">DELIGHTFUL LEARNING BLOG</a> for a start. <a href="http://fiveinarow.com/five-in-a-row/">And here are F.I.A.R. book list if you scroll down to the bottom of their website. </a> They also have a "Before Five in a Row" which I would love to try with my youngers. After doing this sporadically for 2 years, I feel like my kids have really internalized a love for great literature. These books have become so special to us! Here are just examples of some things we did for "Harold and the Purple Crayon"...</div>
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We learned about how the color purple is the color of royalty which inspired our next FIAR book "A Duchess Bakes a Cake". I read the story while they drew it with a purple crayon. We got on a moon kick for a while since the "moon went along with him" and there's a ton of fun ideas on pinterest. Charting the moon phase each night for a month, checking out a telescope from the public library, cutting oreo filling to look like the phases, stuff like that. </div>
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<a href="http://www.jennyphillips.com/la/">The LA curriculum that we've come back to that my kids really craved is Jenny Phillips <span style="color: #8e7cc3;"><span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b>"The Good and the Beautiful."</b></span> </span>Spelling, Reading, Phonics, Language Arts... is all combined into one program. </a> We've like the "Readers" for my 1st grader but not as much the Level 3. It'll be better to choose our own books for him from the library. Love this curriculum! </div>
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Oh and you can order a <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b><a href="https://www.sonlight.com/about/catalog/">free SONLIGHT curriculum catalog</a></b></span> which is full of GREAT book lists for each age. I bought the whole year worth of books and daily schedules and materials but won't again in the future. But many people love this curriculum, and I love her great literature book recommendations! Their "Timeline" book and foldable/laminated map is also really neat.<br />
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For writing, we've tried all sorts of things... writing in journals where parent/child ask each other questions back and forth, writing stories or non-fiction books about things they are interested in. Our new favorite has been the <span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b>"Create a Story" board game</b></span>! So fun and inspires them to use creativity! <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsr5q0iRNAoSvzLPE5aro2ioFF-Mt-A10jxRcOZhIgQZVmVEhjCAuQZzIT8676vy-bAslxJKtDNRHPwIGnZVYcYmI2S_j3qh56bTPHfZEzP9-Wf7Xk7ZTSRvsoKUVBp0c4yyxUZMTFvwxr/s1600/006213i1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="339" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsr5q0iRNAoSvzLPE5aro2ioFF-Mt-A10jxRcOZhIgQZVmVEhjCAuQZzIT8676vy-bAslxJKtDNRHPwIGnZVYcYmI2S_j3qh56bTPHfZEzP9-Wf7Xk7ZTSRvsoKUVBp0c4yyxUZMTFvwxr/s640/006213i1.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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My kids have grown SO much in math just in the last year we've used Math u See, and right now they are ready for a little break (double digit multiplication may need to wait a bit for my 2nd grader), so we're really enjoying <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b>RIGHT START MATH GAMES</b></span> I bought in a kit. There's over 300 games to play ranging to all sorts of varying math levels. That way they are still reviewing and having lots of fun too. I'm sure we'll be back at Math U See as soon as we're ready. </div>
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Oh my goodness we've really loved the <u>hilarious</u> MATH series<span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large; font-weight: bold;">Life of Fred! </span><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">S</span>o grateful my good friend told me about it! I personally don't see this at all as a comprehensive math curriculum but more as a fun supplemental to encourage them to learn math while ENJOYING it.<br />
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I've also heard great things about <b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;">Teaching Textbooks</span></b>, but I haven't tried it yet!</div>
Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-29542643218476298632014-10-26T20:47:00.001-07:002017-05-03T09:44:06.397-07:00All our favorite HOMESCHOOL resources <div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
I think as mothers we deeply worry, and are overwhelmed, and often so discouraged in our motherly pursuits! We compare ourselves and stress that we don't measure up to what we see on facebook or blogs or pinterest. I've greatly hesitated in posting any homeschool pictures because each family needs to find what uniquely works for them. I don't need to look like anyone else's homeschool, and no one has to look like mine. <b>But I leave just this one homeschool post (trying to share some ideas and resources that I'm so grateful other mothers have shared) WITH THE DECLARATION that<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="color: #e06666;">your children don't necessarily need beaded pasta Egypt necklaces or a literal chicken to mummify... YOUR. KIDS. NEED. YOU.</span></span><span style="color: #e06666;"> </span></b> <b>You in every sense.. they need YOUR gifts, your passions, your personality, your interests, your unconditional love for them, the whites of YOUR eyes and YOUR SMILE as you give your attention and love to them. They even need your failures and shortcomings that they may learn and that you can continually point you all to CHRIST's love and grace over and over again. </b></div>
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<b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">How to educate a child is such a private, personal, and I believe spiritual, journey that is different for every single family and even children's different personalities and current needs. </span></b>I'm cheering you all on in figuring what best for you and your kids!!</div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"> And to keep it real before sharing all these fun ideas</span></b>... the LOADS OF LAUNDRY madness continues.. and eternal piles of dishes :), and being continually concerned about various children issues. And feeling behind on most EVERYTHING! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid5IoEZIEs9Mj9qJHAMRxtF0I1oubMZ7OHQlLArqGIZ8dSES0MWPCOnoVj2OSgExRcBFQieCy03P2doxDuHKP-UOXj_qsOPzjYPMI-uwIJlM9LiDhOTPxj70a1oAELu_E6WNUm_m9UNuy8/s1600/IMG_6969.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid5IoEZIEs9Mj9qJHAMRxtF0I1oubMZ7OHQlLArqGIZ8dSES0MWPCOnoVj2OSgExRcBFQieCy03P2doxDuHKP-UOXj_qsOPzjYPMI-uwIJlM9LiDhOTPxj70a1oAELu_E6WNUm_m9UNuy8/s1600/IMG_6969.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;">And this is how super our attempts at potty training went down... we'll try again next time! There's plenty of crazies and exasperating, difficult and how-in-the-heck-can-I-do-this?! moments with homeschool! But luckily the wonderful, incredibly beautiful and bonding moments make it ALL so, so worth it and keep you going... one day at a time :). I'm cheering you on! Find what works FOR YOU and YOUR KIDS and LOVE it!!! Give your kids YOU!!</span></div>
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Our great homeschooling friend introduced us to <b><u><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">The Story of the WORLD series on CD</span></u></b>. My kids haven't totally enjoyed the actually listening to it, but the different historical topics have really inspired some fun hands-on learning! And the CDs have helped me to actually grasp history more - I think they're fascinating. We really enjoyed bringing each historical chapter to life. Starting with the nomads, then how they became farmers, and eventually how civilizations were born like in EGYPT...</div>
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Inside the pyramid we made... Christmas lights just make everything 100 times more exciting.</div>
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Mummifying a Chicken! </div>
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Or for example when learning about <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>Ancient Greece</u></b></span>, we created our own Plaster of Paris theater masks and took them to a play. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVNTBTfvClJFlx-LJNuNNGqlg5yqZJib2hFX59529ezZZ5hRXl5vb4obV9JOFR1n4uN0KvX0Xwcm-C-fJEK3M_TZV0XHW5MdBuEWAE-QB6DDp4VVggc3xFxuDF39SMtAimxSsqS_F5s4w1/s1600/IMG_7733-X3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVNTBTfvClJFlx-LJNuNNGqlg5yqZJib2hFX59529ezZZ5hRXl5vb4obV9JOFR1n4uN0KvX0Xwcm-C-fJEK3M_TZV0XHW5MdBuEWAE-QB6DDp4VVggc3xFxuDF39SMtAimxSsqS_F5s4w1/s640/IMG_7733-X3.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJo9YNaL6nV0oDiSbBR5V0NcpSW1Quyo1bJDDxwPx3G6tGdw-mIAJwyuR6GpYANsrF6oAUWQ4VC_mfRFJP_W8v5xSsHPiId-u2___Nh8z9Rq3SJaqhXNWFuMNxXA05T0OHsC144DKSBu8v/s1600/IMG_7752.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJo9YNaL6nV0oDiSbBR5V0NcpSW1Quyo1bJDDxwPx3G6tGdw-mIAJwyuR6GpYANsrF6oAUWQ4VC_mfRFJP_W8v5xSsHPiId-u2___Nh8z9Rq3SJaqhXNWFuMNxXA05T0OHsC144DKSBu8v/s640/IMG_7752.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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And Oh!!! <a href="http://www.hulu.com/kids-animated-history-with-pipo">We LOVE LOVE LOVE THESE <b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">ANIMATED MOVIES about ancient history</span></b>... especially the ancient China ones.</a> I'd just recommend that you watch them first, to make sure you're ok with what it teaches. <br />
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We really enjoyed exploring <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>Story of the World's "the Jewish People"</u></b></span>... visiting synagogues, attending a fascinating Shabbat worship Friday night, playing Jewish children's games...</div>
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So interesting to find out about how in <b><u><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">ancient China</span></u></b> they wrote on oracle bones or turtle shells. So we wrote on turtle shells our questions about China. My big focus through homeschool is I want to teach them TO BE CURIOUS and ASK QUESTIONS and LOVE LEARNING! And love turtles.</div>
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I laughed so hard when I opened up my fortune cookie... I don't have great patience but I sure NEED lots more of it every single day whew!!! <br />
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Many cities have local Asian grocery stories or other ethnic stores which can help in your learning/exploring!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhABWyZn4vu0E2m3v3Z2lYEZY9L2slgKeaX9BMWCA4adXTBzDoV0jMhFd7ggei8G-JPRyI2fE93OO0aGU9lAQBw4bfVcCoCZKg5v0Eru9_Z1yxFb9xg8DTSr6xclSVFK5FPLipoUKw7SlRO/s1600/51z2EARYArL._SY344_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhABWyZn4vu0E2m3v3Z2lYEZY9L2slgKeaX9BMWCA4adXTBzDoV0jMhFd7ggei8G-JPRyI2fE93OO0aGU9lAQBw4bfVcCoCZKg5v0Eru9_Z1yxFb9xg8DTSr6xclSVFK5FPLipoUKw7SlRO/s320/51z2EARYArL._SY344_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" width="212" /></a>In Kindergarten, they normally begin talking about <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>FICTION vs. NON-FICTION.</u></b></span> For example, we read the Tacky the Penguin series and also learned about Penguins. You could even have your child paste in penguin (or whatever topic) pictures and write in their first own "non-fiction book" to share with others. Brayden went to different friends' homes to read his book and also to do experiments- like putting a "blubber" glove in icy water. One of our Penguin books explained that the Galapagos Penguins are endangered, so we all the sudden decided to open up a little hot cocoa stand outside. We were so surprised that after donating our little $7 to the Galapagos Conservatory, that they sent us a thank you card and fun gifts in the mail! <br />
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We liked <b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><u>F.I.A.R (Five In a Row) </u></span></b>for a while - the idea is you take certain children's picture books and explore lots of different subjects through the literature... use it to teach art, science, cultures, countries, social studies, history... The book lists are found at the bottom of<u> <a href="http://fiveinarow.com/five-in-a-row/">this website</a>. </u> And lots of free creative FIAR ideas are <u><a href="http://www.delightfullearning.net/p/fiar-volume-1-link-up_3.html">found here.</a></u> One of our FIAR books was the super funny "The Duchess Bakes a Cake" which I absolutely adore! We learned about castles & the medieval time period...<br />
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One more example: Our medieval study got us learning about how purple is the color of royalty which then inspired us to our next <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>FIAR book -"Harold and the Purple Crayon"</u></b></span> - so many fun activities you can do with that one! As Harold draws the moon and the "moon went along with him," we got curious about the <u><b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">moon</span></b></u> . Even now when ever we see a "quarter" moon the kids scream and say we need to buy our bouncy moon balls for a quarter! Or when Penny spots a full moon, she wants to have a "Full Moon Cookie Party"! I cry just thinking about how special the dear moon has become to our family. <b><span style="font-size: large;">Whatever YOU decide to study, IT BECOMES SPECIAL to your family!</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">LEARNING TO READ</u> </span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Hooked on Phonics </span>(I totally remember the super cheesy commercials as a kid!) has happened to help my kids with reading. But you also don't have to buy some fancy program to teach kids to read either!! Find your own way - there is HOPE and lots of HELP out there.<br />
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There's a ton of amazing ideas on pinterest for making <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>WORDS/</u></b></span><u><b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">SIGHT WORDS FUN</span></b></u> and I think our favorite word game was "Balloon Words" (where you throw a "word family" (-et, -in, -at ending..) to a consonant to create a word. <br />
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<span style="text-align: start;">Another fun idea was writing sight words on mini paper cups and as they say the words they get to build a huge tower with them. </span></div>
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We also like spelling sight words with shaving cream and a finger :) You can use this for doing math problems too. In Kindergarten they learn what numbers you need to add to get 10.<br />
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Oh they loved the "ZAP!" game... it's a stack of cards I created and laminated with sight words and a few with "ZAP!". When they get a word right, they keep that card. As soon as they read "ZAP!" you take all their cards, and it's fun to see how many cards they have at the end! We just did a different color for each next level he'd earn and add food coloring to Chick Fil A ice cream to celebrate which new level he was on. At the end of our school year, he passed off all the levels and we added all the colors to discover it turns it gray :).<br />
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One teacher inspired me to have the kids choose a setting for their story, and then <b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><u>GO TO THAT VERY SETTING TO WRITE THEIR STORIES</u></span></b>. So brilliant! First they came up with their setting/story plot (they both agreed on the OCEAN), did their illustrations at home... THEN we went to the aquarium to write. <br />
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One Kindergarten teacher/friend inspired me to sometimes focus on <b><u><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Studying a Certain Author.</span></u></b>.. for example Eric Carle and talk about how THEY CAN BE AUTHORS too! It was also fun to try to mimic how Eric Carle creates his illustrations... first he paints tons of white tissue paper all different colors/textures and then cuts out each of the shapes. </div>
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In Kindergarten, they talk about <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>"PERSONAL NARRATIVES"</u></b></span>... a real personal story about one's life. We love "Every Friday" about this boy who goes to the pancake cafe every Friday morning with his dad. I read that sharing lots of "mentor texts" (children's literature- this time demonstrating a personal narrative) first with kids helps them then to create that type of writing on their own. So B chose to write a book called "Every Saturday" which talks about what me and him do together each Saturday. I'm keeping his book forever!<br />
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One week, I had NO idea what we were going to learn about and was overwhelmed with everything. We needed something new, so I got this great idea from one of B's past preschool teachers to <span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>just ASK what they are wondering about</u></b></span>.</span> One night when I was SO ready to tuck them in bed and sign off, they started asking questions about the human body. There are a TON of awesome ideas for teaching about the body on pinterest wow! Did you know you can call your hospital's radiology department and they can give you real xrays for free! </div>
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We had lots of fun making different models of the parts of blood...<br />
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Something I think is neat about homeschool, is having the time to teach about life... not just about blood or the respiratory system, but about the sacredness of procreation, how to "don't stay look away" from pornographic images which surround our world. Having time to show them the beer and cigarettes at the grocery story and talking about how God still loves people who do those things BUT WHY we choose to not do them. Having time to educate their minds, but also to educate their souls and hearts. <br />
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Oh one mom shared this AMAZING IDEA of teaching the <b><u><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">7 days of creation for "science".</span></u></b> Maybe you'd spend a couple weeks on each "day." Like for when God created the heavens/earth you could learn all about stars, planets, earthquakes, volcanos, layers under the earth, whatever! Or for he created light/day you could do science experiments with light or learn about the moon and sun. Or for the day he gave seed/plants you could plant a seed and learn about the life cycle. There's so much you could do with oceans and animals. Or for the day he created man and woman - you could study about the human body. Isn't that so neat?!!! Can't wait to try that out next year.<br />
This picture is when another homeschool family came over and taught us about earthquakes and the layers of the earth... such awesome ideas online oh my goodness!<br />
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Another fun science topic we did for just a few weeks was explore the <b><u><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Periodic Table</span></u></b>. Think about all the fun elements you could study... Neon, Helium, etc...<br />
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For "<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>Aluminum</u></b></span>" we went to our rocketship/airplane museum and wrote letters to Grandma on aluminum foil.<br />
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Kindergarten teachers <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>emphasize the many different types of writing</u></b></span> like writing letters to someone, labeling, a personal narrative, informational writing (non-fiction), a story, or a list (to do list or recipe)...</div>
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I believe this is introduced in 1st grade, but there's fun ways to teach the <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>TENS & ONES</u></b></span> place of numbers. And <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>2D vs. 3D.</u></b></span>..</div>
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I believe in Kindergarten (or maybe it's 1st grade) they sometimes focus on learning my home, my street, my city, my state, my country, my continent, my earth, my solar system... We found this craft idea online and LOVED reading the book <span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><u><b>ME ON THE MAP</b></u></span> book by Joan Sweeney.<br />
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<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u> Find out what's unique to your town!</u></b></span> Out here in the mid-west I discovered we had an awesome Lewis & Clark Museum full of hands-on kids stuff. Who knew?! Brayden chose to be "Captain Lewis," Hailey is "Captain Clark," Penny is Sacajawea, Baby Jack is Pomp, and mommy is the horse.<br />
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Or just another example, our state is famous for being where hundreds of thousands of Sandhill Cranes migrate through each year. So we studied cranes for a bit before visiting this town...</div>
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And I discovered our state's Games & Park Commission rents out huge animal and bird <b><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><u>"EDUCATIONAL TRUNKS"</u></span></b> for free! Oh my goodness! Maybe your state has some kind of similar educational resource for rent. </div>
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I bet your hometown or state has some unique things that make it special! </div>
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If homeschool ever happens to be the right thing for your child and you, I'm cheering you on this incredible adventure! You have special gifts and talents you bring to your family! They'll be moments that are so tough, and they'll also be moments you'll cherish forever. </div>
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Much love,</div>
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Mindy</div>
Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-34020937712006254142013-09-10T19:08:00.000-07:002015-06-05T22:38:44.708-07:00Flowers & Butterflies :)Oh I love these dear little people and wow, so much has happened in the last 6 months! All the daily crazies of motherhood I still well know, but goodness, I'm so eternally grateful to have this opportunity to have my little family!!! They are my very best friends "in the whole woold" as Hailey says. Here's what we've been doing since I haven't been blogging anymore :). I decided to do this huge update post on a day like today... when the day has dragged on forever and I'm super tuckered out (I think today we've really been through 8 gogo squeeze applesauces, and at least 6 gogurts, and 3 movies because I have zero energy). The fridge is leaking some liquid everywhere, the vacuum just broke, and the laundry is piled high. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ6PRnwbEU9-Tag2dJur4QsDe5z9H1Jl7masSdixCpnYBkUWYP2SEOozHNr863FyvlQTfAPPdYv9sGjLuxZcjOnfIjuF2vIcuQ6cMlB_WJA2E87R7-DvImcoEzkk1jAlmWYmuNzpdz6WIR/s1600/IMG_7849.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ6PRnwbEU9-Tag2dJur4QsDe5z9H1Jl7masSdixCpnYBkUWYP2SEOozHNr863FyvlQTfAPPdYv9sGjLuxZcjOnfIjuF2vIcuQ6cMlB_WJA2E87R7-DvImcoEzkk1jAlmWYmuNzpdz6WIR/s640/IMG_7849.JPG" width="640" /></a><br />
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Feeling overwhelmed with all I want and need to do but just can't. We happened to be carless today and therefore homebound which all mothers know is our greatest doom :).. at least for me!<br />
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I really am enjoying these fun stages of my kids right now, but just wanted to post today so you wouldn't think through these fun pictures that our life is <i>all</i> flowers and butterflies :)<br />
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We did plant our first little "garden" of <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #e69138; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">sunflowers</span></b> which has been super fun. And, we're waiting for our <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b>butterflies</b></span> to hatch from their cacoons. I was so excited when those cute caterpillars arrived in our mailbox. I felt like I just had another baby. Did you know you can order caterpillars, lady bugs, and praying mantises?! Pretty cool.<br />
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Oh and we now have <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"><b>30 ANTS</b></span> that have joined our family -<br />
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And I have to introduce <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">"Freddy the Frog"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> </span></b>that showed up on our porch one Sunday. The kids were in their "sunday best" outfits and the rain started pouring down but of course they wanted to play with this new frog. Good thing this time I wasn't stressing over getting them straight inside because running around in the rain with Freddy is one of my most cherished memories thus far.<br />
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Speaking of Sundays, we've started doing <b style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Sunday's Sundaes"</span></b><b style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"> </b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I've thought about doing this fun tradition for so long, and we're just now finally doing it :). I think after surviving 3 hours at church, everyone deserves some whip cream. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Which reminds me of this day. They thought they were so funny. </span><br />
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"Penny Wenny Booka" is just hilarious. Everytime we go to the zoo's aquarium she does her "fish face." We love living by the <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #45818e; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">nation's #1 zoo</span></b>!!<br />
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The fish face... with spaghetti all over.<br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ea9999; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">Oh our little Penny.</span></b> She's pure happiness and joy and in-to-everything-and-everybody's toys.<br />
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Oh and Steve's sisters got married - double back to back <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #674ea7; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">weddings</span></b>! We love having more awesome brothers!! Here's some pics from our UT trip...<br />
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I love the look of concern on my face. See below.<br />
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And that would be Steve jumping through Grandma's bounce house she got for all the toddlers.<br />
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Learning to bake whole wheat yumminess...<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Here's some of the </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">fun things we've done this summer</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> here in the cornfields... </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Being 100 degrees and like 100% humidity, we spent a LOT of time in the water. I think we went through dozens and dozens of dollar store water squirters. And we love our "beach" a couple blocks away!</span><br />
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Baseball, parades, dressing up like pioneers :)...<br />
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And how do you not just throw in a picture like this?!!<br />
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As for an <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">update on my big boy Brayden</span></b>, he is a creative engineer genius!! Notice how he loves ORDER. Everything always in perfect proportions and design. He got zero help from mommy on this one. I was literally sitting on the stroller eating a chocolate bar I mysteriously discovered in the bottom of my diaper bag while he made these.<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">In the morning I find these magnetic "creations" in his room. Notice how even the animals and cars all have their own spot :)! Love this boy of mine.</span><br />
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Brayden is ALL boy... jumping, splashing, running, and ramming into everything (including little sisters, whoops!)</div>
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<b>First day of preschool!!!</b><br />
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And this boy thrives off routine and knowing what to expect, so this system has really been great for him... I painted a cheap clip board with chalkboard paint and we write with dry-erase crayons what he needs to do each morning.. clean room, read scriptures, pray, brush teeth, and get dressed. Each week he earns a dollar store prize. So really what that means is he earns a prize like every 2 weeks - because you know how crazy life gets, it's hit and miss :)<br />
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I've also really been liking this new idea for <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"scripture study."</span></b> I got him a cheap used Bible & Book of Mormon and some colored tabs and colored pencils. Each day he just marks up a verse or two. It's been really simple and fun for him! And it has led to some great little chats. I made sure he highlighted really well "God loveth a cheerful giver" haha<br />
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As for an <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #8e7cc3; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">update on Miss Hailey</span></b>, we love doing "beauty parlor" together. Glad she got those lips covered.</div>
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She loves to be a big girl and do things ALL BY HERSELF! She loves to put her pants on backwards so the pockets can hold all her "treasures."<br />
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And oh my goodness, my little girl had her first day at dance class :). </div>
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Whew! What an update! It had been a while. And Mom - I love you - you're probably the only one that made it all the way through that long post. And wow, I sure need to go to bed NOW so that I can hopefully be more patient and alive for my poor little family after a day like today :)</div>
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On to the endless laundry and dirty dishes and crazy moments and cute, cute wonderful kids!!!!<br />
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Much love,</div>
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Mindy</div>
Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-28078646384733975882013-02-26T11:18:00.001-08:002015-06-13T21:38:18.072-07:00Bye Bye to Busy Bliss... for now :)<b>Time is precious. And so are these little dears. This is just not my season to have a blog like this :).</b> <b> It's causing me to be way too "busy" and stressed ironically. Motherhood is sacrifice. It is work (whew, is it work!), but it is the GREATEST WORK on earth!</b> What a great adventure it has been to have a voice for mothers who deeply desire to be intentional and to thrive in this most challenging, most paramount work! I will forever cherish all the comments and the wonderful women I've meet through this blog. <br />
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With three kids three and under, I need less distractions (even the really good things) and more MOMENTS to focus on THEM. This is my greatest life's work and I don't want to miss it! <br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #38761d; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I'll be posting from time to time to update with pictures, but I leave you with my conviction that:</span></b><br />
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<b>The greatest gift you can give your children is YOU. If you're human than you're going to have really hard moments (even to the point of tears) but I believe that mothers can learn and grow and TRY AGAIN every day. We truly have the most influential job on earth. Choosing to have daily moments of teaching and connecting will be our greatest investment! I hope we all can find JOY and our desperate need for CHRIST in the midst of all our motherly mayhem.</b><br />
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Maybe there'll be another season for me to spread my feelings through writing. But here's the little dears that need MORE of me. And Steve that includes you too babes :). <br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/l70e1TfN34w?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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And here's my favorite video that reminds me what matters most.</div>
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Much Love,</div>
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Mindy</div>
<br />Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-34855338926502572232013-02-14T21:06:00.001-08:002013-07-07T16:21:16.430-07:00Love StoryIt was my freshman year first semester at BYU and I lucked out to have this boy in my ward. Unfortunately, he was the ONLY boy I didn't talk to! I remember walking out the glass doors of my Deseret Towers dorms and seeing that red head playing pool in the lobby. I thought to myself, man I wish I had gotten to know that guy. But it was too late as he was quickly leaving on his church mission to Tennessee (my home!). <br />
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So two years passed and I had an incredible college experience. And... luckily I had memorized everyone's name in the freshman ward directory so I recognized this red head when we ran into each other ... me on my way to the computer lab and him on his way to the gym. Typical. And on a cute side note, the exact place where his grandparents met - the Smith Field House. <br />
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We ran into each other a few times and I conveniently needed a ride to my brother's in Bountiful and found out Steve's family lives near there. So, I found many reasons why I needed to visit that sweet brother :) which meant we were trapped in a car together for hours... no dates, no awkwardness, and yes... no dates. For a long time. I couldn't quite figure out if he was ever going to ask me out. He did come over to fix my bike :), to pick up my roommate's dying fish, to give me rides, but I finally challenged him to a taco eating contest. He ate 10. I ate 2. <br />
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One weekend I was in the middle of a "girls' night" - ice cream, chick flick and all when Steve left a message that the fish "missed me" and was wondering if I had some time to see them! So we hopped on our bikes and met in the middle at some point finding ourselves at the local elementary school climbing these trees and eventually playing football and dancing on the school rooftop!<br />
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One day while riding my bike down a steep hill south of campus, a girl came out of nowhere! I swirved and barely missed taking her out and instead skidded my face all down the pavement. My first thought was Am I alive? Then my next thought was "Call Steve." So I hobbled home and Steve rushed me to the doctors. He was so overly concerned - it was cute. He even took me out for ice cream and bought me a bunch of groceries. That week I was homebound and Steve came to visit me everyday... with PB & Js (haha, that was a great prelude to the food he eats), Jamba Juice, and just making me laugh. But oh it hurt to laugh.<br />
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I landed a job at BYU's Center for Service so we found ourselves doing a LOT of service. We didn't have money and I just loved watching that boy help others. I thought Wow, he's sure going to be a good daddy someday...<br />
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Plus, he was super good looking...<br />
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And I knew that if he could tell me he loved me through Blokus, then he'd be an amazing husband too :)<br />
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So we dated a year, and then I decided I wanted to go on a semester abroad to Jerusalem (which Steve totally supported, even though that was the hardest day of my life to say goodbye). We got married, and I did discover what an incredible husband and daddy I had chosen for our family. I love Steve for so many reasons, but I think my favorite thing is watching him play with our kids and seeing how they adore each other. </div>
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I grabbed the video camera last night as the kids were super excited that Daddy was coming home :). And whew, I was happy too :). I love you babe. Thanks for being my bestest friend and for being the kids' best friend too. Happy love day!<br />
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<br />Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-51065969116153589132013-02-02T09:33:00.003-08:002015-06-07T14:17:29.824-07:00Chocolate Chip Cookies that Melt in Your MouthI've been in a rut lately. So in an attempt to snap out of it, we tried doing something new.... finding a way to run outside in the cold snow with three little ones! ... and making sure everyone got good, early naps :), because that just makes ALL the difference. So we bought these snow suits, played outside, and came in to eat chocolate chip cookies (my fav recipe from Steve's mom... see below)! It felt rejuvenating and so stinkin' fun!! Humans were not made to be cooped inside a house all day.<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><span style="color: #161616;">The BEST Chocolate Chip Cookies</span></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1 c. sugar<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1 c. brown sugar<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">In a separate bowl, sift together:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Mix together dry and wet ingredients separately then add together, then add the chocolate chips (Ghirardelli is best). Bake at 350 for 8-9 minutes (and not a second MORE! It will seem that they are not done but just take them out and they'll be perfect).</span></div>
Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-19089073419159872282012-11-25T20:28:00.001-08:002013-07-05T06:24:10.554-07:00DIY Children's Bookshelf - Book Covers Showing!<div style="text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY42jv7OblN2Jez9un-k3yvCIvxS5XMPgifK1bhXLvwbO48jmLzkSCrFkCVhLo_cKUgh_Oa_mhxz0MNJF4oMqRVuY9M0KBrPGNiT0P10KWKfBFXh0lw3VhvwO3Amj3gh8ghhmW3dDfxDlJ/s1600/IMG_3266.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="602" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY42jv7OblN2Jez9un-k3yvCIvxS5XMPgifK1bhXLvwbO48jmLzkSCrFkCVhLo_cKUgh_Oa_mhxz0MNJF4oMqRVuY9M0KBrPGNiT0P10KWKfBFXh0lw3VhvwO3Amj3gh8ghhmW3dDfxDlJ/s640/IMG_3266.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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The day has come! I've had the supplies for months , but I finally finished this bookshelf that displays the book covers! My kids initiate reading tons more now, so I think it's worth every penny and all the effort!! Here's how it's done...</div>
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<i>Materials Needed:</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvE5aQMTQ6Y8YjputxKgcqrO8SGfi_Oi-AFfXE4bh8AqdW89EOT_-neC48qWQVIf7kPoa49ygMwysz_9xyazIJNv4Hg41i402hVvxkuvqLulSEJj0ypJHtZD6Z0qw76zVMQKTknRLyM2fz/s1600/IMG_3007.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvE5aQMTQ6Y8YjputxKgcqrO8SGfi_Oi-AFfXE4bh8AqdW89EOT_-neC48qWQVIf7kPoa49ygMwysz_9xyazIJNv4Hg41i402hVvxkuvqLulSEJj0ypJHtZD6Z0qw76zVMQKTknRLyM2fz/s320/IMG_3007.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="213" /></a></div>
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Back Square Piece (34.5" x 36")</div>
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1 x 4 x 6' Wood boards (4 boards 34.5" for the perimeter, 2 boards 33" for shelves) </div>
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6 Dowels (this time I tried the square ends rather than the circular ends)</div>
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Wood Filler or Wall Spackle</div>
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White Primer</div>
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Paint color</div>
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<i>Tools Needed:</i></div>
Power drill<br />
Hand saw (to cut dowels to correct size)<br />
Sand paper<br />
Screws (1 5/8 in.)<br />
Countersink tool (to embed your screws so you can cover with filler for smooth finish)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0aqHkOmQ-M1-2ZDf8OhKjQVCTf6AypqvlW55jf15XMDA_-Lb2UHbagmJT6F8p1x6EQCwIhA99IGVDpVARKQOY8SdpNW0ym1xxC2cGxBhQM26aaDhdUpAnQeOZqjOM3I61BU3EJVYHPK_t/s1600/IMG_3005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0aqHkOmQ-M1-2ZDf8OhKjQVCTf6AypqvlW55jf15XMDA_-Lb2UHbagmJT6F8p1x6EQCwIhA99IGVDpVARKQOY8SdpNW0ym1xxC2cGxBhQM26aaDhdUpAnQeOZqjOM3I61BU3EJVYHPK_t/s320/IMG_3005.JPG" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>1. Decide what size bookshelf you want. </b></span> If you can get a back piece for cheap (like at Home Depot's "Cull Lumber" - which are their discounted scraps usually from 50 cents - $4) that may decide what size you can do. For my previous bookshelf, I used Lowe's bead board so I had to do 2' x 3'. <br />
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I choose to have 4 pieces - 34.5" long. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1r3mZnxX-JSKZjBEGrWpCR0LgNf1RFNDh-XOKaYwFGLDZZFjWqSz6kZw4kXj4Xx-qbUNUAcwsgdwlzXeIzU6rjZm12kIO-_1F0Z8MiWMubmLuQwo98_kWhgnGx5Y5ZkFsfgQyRN6vhJHB/s1600/IMG_3008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="305" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1r3mZnxX-JSKZjBEGrWpCR0LgNf1RFNDh-XOKaYwFGLDZZFjWqSz6kZw4kXj4Xx-qbUNUAcwsgdwlzXeIzU6rjZm12kIO-_1F0Z8MiWMubmLuQwo98_kWhgnGx5Y5ZkFsfgQyRN6vhJHB/s320/IMG_3008.JPG" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">2. Begin to screw all sides together. </span></b> I used my countersink tool to pre-drill holes for the screws. After the screws were all in, I used wood filler to cover up the holes. After it dries, you sand those spots. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib7xaiIF2cUJMRZ6Np5xYQZ7A-meJ3tMewaABX3R_MGXUAqV1jHLbgHZNphDF_x4ACe61VkOsQrrflsxekA9dyz2MoT56LFGhT54FBZnYELZwrR3iKN-HnM1DsaFeMgvKDvkWRZQzFK47m/s1600/IMG_3013.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib7xaiIF2cUJMRZ6Np5xYQZ7A-meJ3tMewaABX3R_MGXUAqV1jHLbgHZNphDF_x4ACe61VkOsQrrflsxekA9dyz2MoT56LFGhT54FBZnYELZwrR3iKN-HnM1DsaFeMgvKDvkWRZQzFK47m/s320/IMG_3013.JPG" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">3. Screw the backing on. </span></b> I had trouble getting my square back to perfectly fit just fyi. So mine doesn't match up just right. I ended up having to do a lot of sanding and it wasn't at all perfect - but oh well! I did about 4 screws along each side. <br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">4. Put in your 2 middle shelves and screw them in along the sides and back.</span></b><br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"> 6. Sand the whole project. </span></b> First coarse and then fine. Maybe it's because I bought the cheapest electric sander, but I think I prefer just using my hand. My project could have used a ton more sanding but I just didn't have the time! At one point I had Penny in my carrier and the kids swarming around me on their bikes in our community laundry room while I <i>tried</i> to bust out the electric sander! It must have been a funny sight to see.<br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">7. Prime and Paint. </span></b> You want to prime the new wood so your wood doesn't completely soak up all your final paint. I used a roller brush and regular paint brush just for the edges. <br />
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<b style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">8. Cut the dowels (which keep the books in) to just the right size.</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">It's better to cut a little big at first since it's easy to quickly saw to make it a perfect fit.</span><br />
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9. <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Pre-drill pilot holes </span></b>through the sides and dowels to prevent breaking the wood. After <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">screwing each dowel into place on both sides, cover holes with filler/spackle.</span></b> I also spackled each corner for a smoother finish. When dry, sand those spots and touch up paint.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghPi0DChp7EH2gHh9vue3cMMA-Glh3YMct05HMDXd-eHaDhenRWCmmD0e2lJgX4BA0kMB5iwS6OOVNX1r_ntfV1LtxNLJAAqCKBpIFzkNvUuLkhETqzgVJACokjS1ECqUkgAFgb3CWYuWn/s1600/IMG_3252.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghPi0DChp7EH2gHh9vue3cMMA-Glh3YMct05HMDXd-eHaDhenRWCmmD0e2lJgX4BA0kMB5iwS6OOVNX1r_ntfV1LtxNLJAAqCKBpIFzkNvUuLkhETqzgVJACokjS1ECqUkgAFgb3CWYuWn/s320/IMG_3252.JPG" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">10. And you have your awesome bookshelf! </span></b> I used these corner brackets (directly under the middle shelves, screwed into the wall studs) to make it extra sturdy.<br />
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<br />Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-19272287260164605252012-11-09T14:35:00.002-08:002015-06-01T21:17:13.203-07:00Potty Train in 3 Days... It worked!!!!We finally did it. My oldest child is fully potty trained. I secretly worried and wondered if the day would ever come :). I made my first attempt when my little boy was just 2 and it seemed like he wasn't at all physiologically or verbally ready for it. Then at 2 1/2, I tried again but it was an utter failure and a totally frustrating experience for all of us! We tried the method of pumping him with lots of fluids, trying to keep him on the potty practically all day, and making him go to the potty like every 20 minutes. Then we had a baby, and life was just too crazy. We ended up back and forth in pull-ups for sleep and running errands and such. <b>It was NO GOOD.</b> So we took a break and put him back in diapers.<br />
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<a href="http://www.3daypottytraining.com/">A friend whole-heartedly recommended <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"3 Day Potty Training" by Lora Jensen</span></b>. </a> It's an ebook that you buy online and then you get the PDF electronic copy and a lifetime of one-on-one mentoring with Lora. She doesn't just email one to two sentences. She'll email you full paragraphs to help you with your specific questions. This lady is brilliant and her method worked amazingly!!! So here's basically what we did:<br />
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<b><u>For Preparation:</u></b><br />
-She recommends <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>potty training as early as 22 months</b></span> if they are showing the signs of readiness... basically that they have a way to communicate to you the need to go potty. It worked for us at age 3. She explains more signs in her ebook. <br />
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-Since we had previously started a different method that didn't work, we put him <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>back in diapers completely for at least 30 days</b></span> before starting this new method.<br />
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-we went to the store to let him <b style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">pick out his own underwear.</b><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-We made it a </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">PARTY</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">! The night before, I taped balloons, some underwear, and pictures of him on the bathroom door.</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-We </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Decided on rewards</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> we wanted to do. For example, putting fuzz balls in a jar and opening up a dollar store gift when it's full. Or M&Ms or fun stickers, etc. We chose a special reward for #2 - go-gurts! </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-I </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>stocked my fridge</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>with</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> a fun variety of exciting </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6aa84f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>drinks</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">. We let him help pick these out too ... I put them all in a big container in the fridge a couple days before we began just to build up the excitement and suspense.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><u>For Day 1:</u></b></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-He woke up, and we marched to the bathroom to get super excited about our POTTY PARTY! I over-emphasized how now he was a </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large; font-weight: bold;">"</span><u style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large; font-weight: bold;">BIG</u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large; font-weight: bold;"> BOY"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> and how PROUD I was of him! </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-The </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>KEY was to STAY POSITIVE and PRAISE continually</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> for 3 days straight. For 3 days, I needed to believe in him and not get frustrated. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-We</span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> TOOK OFF his very <i>LAST</i> DIAPER</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> and I had </span><u style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">him</u> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>THROW AWAY EVERY DIAPER</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">/pull-up left. This part is more for the parent than the child. She says you MUST GET RID of every last one so you won't be tempted to revert back to them.</span><br />
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-Then, he got <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>to pick out</b></span><b style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"> HIS FIRST UNDERWEAR to wear!</b><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">-We excitedly </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">ran back to the potty, and I explained 2 things:</span></b><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>1. Keep your underwear DRY and</b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>2. TELL MOMMY when you have to go</b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Absolutely</span><b style="color: #b45f06; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"> NO more asking him</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> if he needs to go. You only say over and over again...</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06;">"Tell Mommy when you need to go."</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06;"> </span> You now are fully <b>trusting him</b> that by the end of the 3 days, he will learn to tell you. It may take the full 3 days and lots of accidents, but stick with it, and it will click. </span><br />
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<u><b>Tips for Days 1-3:</b></u></div>
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*For 3 full days, STAY RIGHT BY HIS SIDE!! The key is to never leave his side so you can catch him "in the act," scoop him up, and run him to the potty to hopefully "FINISH" in the toilet. Even if he only ends up going one drop into the toilet - PRAISE HIM!! Stay positive and encouraging even in the midst of accidents. Keep reminding him throughout the day to tell you when he needs to go, and be super excited every time he does tell you!!</div>
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*All throughout the day, praise him for staying dry. You can ask him if he's dry, have him feel to check, and praise again. </div>
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*NEVER force him to go. No more making him "try" or requiring that he stay on the potty longer. </div>
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* Since #2 is hard, make sure you pick a special reward that will mean a lot to your child. To get this part totally down with no accidents, it took actually a little longer than 3 days for us. </div>
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*We never reverted back to diapers/pull ups - even for naps and nights. We did go through accidents and changing sheets and washing lots of underwear those first few days. But he learned by following the steps Lora recommends for nap/sleep time... <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">We didn't give him liquids 2 hours before bedtime (which was a total change for us). </span>Check out the ebook for more suggestions and tips. She has great ideas that totally helped us. I honestly was suspicious that it wouldn't work, but he did it!!!!! </div>
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<b>There are so many potty training methods out there, but I'm so grateful that this finally worked for us. THERE IS HOPE for us mothers! </b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span>Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-87496962225705429022012-10-23T22:14:00.001-07:002015-06-20T23:08:18.033-07:00DATE NIGHT Ideas...<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<b>RECREATE YOUR FIRST DATE (or any special past <span class="il">date</span>):</b> What were you wearing? Where did you go? What did you do and talk about? </div>
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<span style="text-transform: uppercase;"><b>BOOKSTORE <span class="il">DATE</span>: </b><b style="font-size: 14pt;"> </b></span>Go to the bookstore and pick some of these options: an interesting magazine to browse, a cookbook recipe to make, a favorite picture book from your childhood, a travel book for a country you'd love to visit someday, some funny jokes in a joke book...<br />
<b><span style="font-size: 14pt; text-transform: uppercase;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="text-transform: uppercase;">MOVIE <span class="il">NIGHT</span>:</span></b> Surprise your hubby with some sparkling cider, popcorn, and a movie. Or blow up an air mattress in your front room or cuddle on the couch as you watch a Redbox rental and eat popcorn. You could even check out a movie for free from the library. Keep a running list of movies you want to watch together.</div>
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<b>PICK OUT A BOOK: </b> Find a book that you would both enjoy and start reading it together. </div>
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<b>GET FIT:</b> Exercise to a workout video together. Then enjoy a protein shake or fruit smoothie afterwards! <br />
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<b>CANDLELIGHT BY WATER: </b>Throw a blanket out near a river, pond, stream, and light a candle, eat some treat, and be together!</div>
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<b>PLAN FOR A RUN:</b> Find a 5k, 10k, or ½ marathon to sign up for together. Decide on your training plan. You can even go on <a href="http://www.gmap-pedometer.com/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">www.gmap-pedometer.com</a> to find out how many miles are certain nearby runs. </div>
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<b>DOLLAR <span class="il">DATE</span>:</b> Grab food at a fast food restaurant’s dollar menu and go to the dollar store to pick something out for each other with a certain money limit. You could even go to the dollar movies.</div>
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<b>INDOOR CAMPOUT: </b><span style="text-transform: uppercase;">C</span>ook tin foil dinners in the oven, make smores with your broiler, read a book by flashlight, and sleep out in your front room!</div>
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<b>PLAY GAMES: </b><span style="text-transform: uppercase;">B</span>uy a new game and play or enjoy one you already have! Have treats to go with it and maybe even make a bet for what the winner gets.</div>
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<b>Take an ONLINE PERSONALITY TEST: </b><a href="http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">Click Here</a> to take a free personality test to get your four-letter personality type. It even tells you famous people that share your type along with where you thrive and where you struggle. Once you have both of your types, you can even click on “Jung Marriage Test” to read about your compatibility as a couple just for fun. This is very fascinating and insightful!</div>
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<b>TEST YOUR LOVE LANGUAGE:</b> <span style="color: #1d1d1d;"><a href="http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">Click Here</a> to test your top love languages. Afterwards, take turns doing something in each other’s love language! </span></div>
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<b>TRAVEL from your Home:</b> This fun <span class="il">date</span> <span class="il">night</span> can be done multiple times with different countries you are interested in. All dates could include eating food from that country, learning interesting facts about the country, watching a movie based there or about it, printing off some pictures, watching a short youtube tour of that country or famous city, and maybe even dancing to their music! For examples:</div>
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*France: Put out cheeses, fruits, French bread, and juice for “wine.” Dance to French accordian music. Google beforehand about “interesting facts about France.” </div>
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*Italy: Make homemade pizzas together, play Andre Bocelli music, and enjoy painting!</div>
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*New Zealand: Eat Kiwis, learn about cool facts on Wikipedia, watch Lord of the Rings…</div>
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<b>DINNER & JAR OF QUESTIONS: </b>Beforehand, print out interesting, fun questions and place in a jar. Make a fun dinner recipe together. While you eat, pull out questions that both of you have to answer. Some examples are: What are some of your fears? Describe your relationship with your parents. What are 5 passions that you have? What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced? What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now? What are 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could? List 3 people have have influenced you and describe how. What are some of your pet peeves? What do you think are some of your greatest strengths/weaknesses? How do you want to be a better spouse? If you were an animal, what would you be and why? What is the thing you most wish you were great at? Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood. If you could have one superpower, what would it be? List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be? What is your favorite part of your body and why? What do you think people misunderstand most about you? List some things you would hope to be remembered for…</div>
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<b>VIDEOTAPE EACH OTHER:</b> Pull out of the video camera and record asking each other various questions. Some examples are: What was your hometown like? How well did you get a long with your siblings, parents, teachers? If you could re-do anything from the past what would it be? What were you like in elementary, junior high, and high school? What are some of your happiest memories from your childhood? What are 2 of your favorite breakfasts, lunches, dinners, snacks, and desserts? Name some of your hobbies. How did you meet each other? Name 3 of your favorite traits of your spouse. List some of your favorite traits of each child. What is your favorite color, animal, book, movie? What was college like? What is the craziest thing you have ever done? What are some of your dreams for your family? List 3 pieces of advice. </div>
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<b>PAINT SOMETHING OLD:</b> Pick out a cheap piece of furniture at the Restore or DI or KSL and re-paint it together. Or paint something you already have and fix it up! Or grab some cheap canvas and paint away. </div>
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<b>CREATE A VISION:</b> Brainstorm your current goals and some of your longer-term visions for the future. Use materials you already have to create some kind of display to put on your refrigerator or in your bedroom. Or you could place in sheet protectors and tape them up to the shower wall to read often! </div>
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<b>FUTURE DREAM HOUSE:</b> Walk/drive around a fun neighborhood and dream about what you do/don’t like for your future home. Or, draw out your ideal floor plan and talk about each room.</div>
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Bake cookies together and make<b> <span style="text-transform: uppercase;">ICE CREAM SANDWICHES</span>. </b></div>
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Light some candles, give massages, and have a <b>SPA <span class="il">NIGHT</span>.</b></div>
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<b>PLAN an UPCOMING TRIP </b>together, whether it’s just a one-day adventure or a couple day mini vacation with your kids.</div>
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<b>PIGGY BANK. </b> Create some kind of “piggy bank” where you can start putting all your spare change. Decide as a couple something fun you want to start saving for! </div>
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Bring a blanket to a fun park and lay down and <b style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: medium; text-transform: uppercase;">TALK UNDER THE STARS. </b></div>
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<!--EndFragment-->Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-74240172625612212662012-10-12T05:49:00.000-07:002013-09-12T20:51:22.202-07:00Confessions of a Stay-at-Home Mom...Life for me right now feels a lot like Bill Murray's Groundhog's Day... every day is the same. Lots of this... (whew, it's actually sorted here!)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHkLfFOr7HzaM2BAlxScqMXMCoVRX691fhbFIMhY12LRGWc8znKl1XezI7bcj52oEuxq6UjLKOMcu7v___QLjxZAceR5dGJWor6Dt1rh4lVSWCjJ3TxIsGtjGMg6pVtV4s3GEP-QfC-6DA/s1600/DSC_0194.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHkLfFOr7HzaM2BAlxScqMXMCoVRX691fhbFIMhY12LRGWc8znKl1XezI7bcj52oEuxq6UjLKOMcu7v___QLjxZAceR5dGJWor6Dt1rh4lVSWCjJ3TxIsGtjGMg6pVtV4s3GEP-QfC-6DA/s400/DSC_0194.jpg" width="262" /></a></div>
and this...<br />
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and pouts... lots of pouts<br />
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Cleaning out the ETERNAL GRIME ... I will not post a picture of this.</div>
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and cleaning up this cute adorable face... :)</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoIfm_CtbZWcecruILky5FND9Wefrh5CmH-8Mdd24SF4ZqMGWDMLdVM9kByt-LGmNHG8WFPsfHn_njEF8YTG1EfvV7sOeOVj3OjwpeqBNVuKiPO0nBLvNFzN3kKt0zcppcvdhI_WTYuosv/s1600/IMG_1714.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoIfm_CtbZWcecruILky5FND9Wefrh5CmH-8Mdd24SF4ZqMGWDMLdVM9kByt-LGmNHG8WFPsfHn_njEF8YTG1EfvV7sOeOVj3OjwpeqBNVuKiPO0nBLvNFzN3kKt0zcppcvdhI_WTYuosv/s640/IMG_1714.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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and handling melt downs...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMu0cr-bWlQFevObwPnPXp6C-i6w_lShyphenhyphenmqOWM5g_J420tzMRSR1MoT_xLfZA6RH5-8-qpaLKIgyQPi2UX5kNOo1sRgaAQM4XVG_XFitck1p-eHVYQnaSAifeIk0Kxuw8RS88JzvK3d3Oi/s1600/IMG_1577.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMu0cr-bWlQFevObwPnPXp6C-i6w_lShyphenhyphenmqOWM5g_J420tzMRSR1MoT_xLfZA6RH5-8-qpaLKIgyQPi2UX5kNOo1sRgaAQM4XVG_XFitck1p-eHVYQnaSAifeIk0Kxuw8RS88JzvK3d3Oi/s640/IMG_1577.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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and wiping this...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9eQhOUJgrLi_vE48S7JOg0N44mF5jVNTZMLW7lLqYioCJrKMk3LycWoqZ2KkA1dYiIHFwB9HjVbembZ6PGVdElG4N22aDzL6mXTgf70yMmzWM6UDgtK8Zu4AaAclinaBQFLPdFtEdTk6d/s1600/DSC_0250.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="422" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9eQhOUJgrLi_vE48S7JOg0N44mF5jVNTZMLW7lLqYioCJrKMk3LycWoqZ2KkA1dYiIHFwB9HjVbembZ6PGVdElG4N22aDzL6mXTgf70yMmzWM6UDgtK8Zu4AaAclinaBQFLPdFtEdTk6d/s640/DSC_0250.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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and trying to get them to eat things...<br />
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and reading the same cute book for the umpteenth time :)...<br />
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and needing more of this... that is <i>actually</i> having time to shower and get ready :) haha<br />
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and EVERYONE needing a whole ton more of GOOD SLEEP... oh what am I ever going to do about that?! And yes that is chocolate frosties all over them. <br />
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and oh the WORRY of a mother... I'm often stressed about something - how am I going to help a child through a certain issue, how are we going to get through the day...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjntXvealYn0L9u525_j2xSxVl-86I5LJDUM3HV1pYVWZUs37JADWkyu2eR9F6tm23ZeeUeiy5NCdIgw6Xw8U_0YkPIbjE2xf7OlnzH3kbJz_2N6VVNEhn43sFqfnocBTQqCiynfnEUY9GP/s1600/DSC_0157.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="422" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjntXvealYn0L9u525_j2xSxVl-86I5LJDUM3HV1pYVWZUs37JADWkyu2eR9F6tm23ZeeUeiy5NCdIgw6Xw8U_0YkPIbjE2xf7OlnzH3kbJz_2N6VVNEhn43sFqfnocBTQqCiynfnEUY9GP/s640/DSC_0157.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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and I wish more of this... :) This happens to be a cute happy hug even though it looks like a death grip.</div>
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So I'm thinking the answer is just I should never have to sleep! Wouldn't that be such a gift to mothers?! Anywho, here's some more confessions of HOW I COPE:<br />
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1. <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">We CAN'T "STAY AT HOME" :)</span></b> Right now, havoc breaks out when we're home for too long. My kids do SO much better OUT OF THE HOUSE... at a park, anywhere outside, exciting museums, a fun kid's place... They don't usually fight as much or have nearly as many tantrums when we're OUT doing "kids" stuff. It's a mother's therapy - and kids' therapy.<br />
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2. Sometimes just <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">FORGET IT ALL</span></b>, and <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">LIVE IN THE MOMENT</span></b>. For me right now, I don't think having a continually clean home is anywhere near realistic. I've tried :). <b>I think there's hope in just dropping it all for a while (when we can't fix or control it then anyways) and focusing on being happy and making your kids happy. </b> Last night, it was 9pm and the kids were <i>still</i> awake. And... the house was a complete mess. And... I was about it tears a few times yesterday with being completely <b>overwhelmed as a mother</b>. And... I <i>really</i> needed to shower. BUT... I found myself sitting on our messy kitchen floor and just laughing hysterically with my kids. Hailey was randomly stuffing bread in my mouth :) My tired self relished in the giddy happiness in their faces, and I guarantee we'll all remember that...<br />
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-10315675896560998892012-08-05T18:46:00.002-07:002015-06-13T21:54:54.776-07:00The Basic Tips from 3 Baby Books<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The Happiest Baby on the Block:</span></b></div>
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The first couple months of a baby's life is like a "4th Trimester" as they transition from the womb to the world. They desire an <span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">environment similar to inside their mother's womb</span>. Here's Dr. Karp's 5 S's to help your new baby to be happier:</div>
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1. <u style="background-color: #ffe599;">SUCKING</u> - Newborns have a <b>great need to suck</b>, so nursing of course and pacifiers.</div>
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2. <u style="background-color: #ffe599;">SWINGING</u> - Similar to the womb experience, babies often love the motion of swinging side to side, riding in the car, walking the room with a parent, and rocking. Our <b>motor swing</b> has been a complete life saver! </div>
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3. <u style="background-color: #ffe599;">SHUSHING</u> - <b>White noise</b> machines or cds, "ssshhhh"ing loudly, vacuuming, turning on a fan can all be soothing.</div>
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4. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;"><u>SIDE/STOMACH</u> </span><b>position</b> - <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> H<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;">olding your baby on the left side to aid in digestion or holding the baby on her stomach to provide support. Being held on their back often causes babies to startle. Once a baby is calmed down and sleeping, they can then safely be put on their back for sleeping.</span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;">5. <u style="background-color: #ffe599;">SWADDLING</u> - </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; line-height: 16px;">Tight swaddling</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; line-height: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; line-height: 16px;">provides the continuous touching and support the fetus experienced while still in Mom's womb. Oh my <b>Mobe Wrap</b> has also made all the difference! It gives </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 16px;">me hope :) and extra hands which a young mom is always in need of.</span></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Baby Wise:</span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Baby Wise's "flexible routine" of PDF (Parent-Directed Feeding)</span> <b>is the center point between strict clock-feeding on one extreme and demand feeding/child-led feeding at the other. </b> PDF provides tools to recognize and assess 2 potential problems with infant feeding: a) A child who feeds often, such as every hour, may not be getting the rich hind milk. And b) When the cue is not present, the clock serves as a guide to ensure that too much time does not elapse between feedings (like if a baby is sick or is doing his longer sleeping stretches during the day instead of at night). </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">For the first 7-10 days, don't look at the clock but rather focus on one thing --> getting a FULL feeding at each feeding - no snacking. This often naturally falls into a predictable 2.5-3 hour routine. </span> But you do have to work on keeping your baby awake at each feeding since they are usually sleepy. Average 8-10 feedings in 24-hour period</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599; font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><u>Normal Weight-Gain Guide:</u></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>Birth-2 weeks:</b> Regain birth weight plus</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>2 weeks-3 months:</b> 2 lbs. per month or 1 oz. per day</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>4-6 months:</b> 1 lb. per month or 1/2 oz. per day</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>6 months: </b>doubles birth weight</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>1 year:</b> 2.5-3 times birth weight</span></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Baby Whisperer:</span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Structured Routine - E.A.S.Y</span></div>
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Think of it as a recurring period more or less 3 hours long, in which each of the following segments occurs in this order:</div>
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<b>E - Eating</b>. A normal baby, weighing 6 lbs. or more, can go 2.5-3 hours until the next feed.</div>
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<b>A - Activity. </b> Sometimes this is as simple as changing a diaper.</div>
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<b>S - Sleeping. </b> Takes 15-20 minutes to fall asleep. Put baby down drowsy and soothed but still awake. Put him down once you have met his needs. The author never leaves a screaming baby, but she does put baby down the minute he's calm. </div>
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<b>Y - You.</b> Take care of yourself and possibly rest. [And what if you have other kids? :)]</div>
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<li style="text-align: left;"><b>Freshly expressed breast milk</b> should be placed in the fridge immediately and stored for no longer than 3 days. </li>
<li style="text-align: left;"><b>You can freeze breast milk up to 6 months</b>, but by then your baby's needs are different. The miracle of breast milk is that the composition changes as your baby grows.</li>
<li style="text-align: left;"><b>Thaw breast milk </b>by placing the sealed container in a bowl of warm water for about 30 minutes. Never use a microwave (it breaks down the protein). Shake the container to blend any fat that may have separated. Feed thawed milk immediately or store it in the fridge for no longer than 24 hours. <b>You can combine fresh breast milk with thawed, but never refreeze. </b></li>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Breastfeeding Dilemmas: Hunger, Need to Suckle, or Growth Spurt?</span></div>
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Newborns have a physical need to suckle approximately 16 hours out of every 24 hours. Growth spurts usually happen around every 3-4 weeks. All-day hunger binges only last around 48 hours. If your baby wakes up hungry one night, feed your baby that night, but the next day give her more feedings during the day to up caloric intake during growth spurt. If your baby seems extra hungry only at night, it's probably not a growth spurt. Rather, it's a sign that she's not getting enough calories and you need to adjust your E.A.S.Y routine to accommodate your baby's need for more calories. This may be a good time to "cluster feed" in the evening (nursing at closer intervals). Also, in the morning, after a good night's rest, your breast milk is richest in fat. You could pump early in the day and save that fat-rich milk for a nighttime feed. </div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Pacifiers</span></div>
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The author likes to use a pacifer for the first 3 months of life to give a baby adequate sucking time, to calm her before sleep, or when she's trying to help baby skip a night feed. After that period, however, infants have more control over their hands and will be able to self-soothe using their own hands. </div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Introducing Solids</span></div>
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Most pediatricians suggest waiting until your baby is 6 months old before starting to introduce solid foods. By the 6th month, your baby needs the extra iron found in solid foods, as her store of iron has been depleted by this point. Also, a baby's reflex to stick out her tongue when anything touches it has disappeared, so she is better able to swallow mushy solids. Also by 6 months, head and neck control has developed. </div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">Sleeping Through the Night </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> [I'd like to add that the definition of "sleeping through the night" is technically about a 5-6 hour stretch, not the entire night!]</span></div>
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<li style="text-align: left;"><b>During the day, never let a baby sleep more than a feed cycle - no longer than 3 hours - because otherwise it will rob his nighttime sleep hours. </b></li>
<li style="text-align: left;">One of the ways we get babies to sleep more at night is by filling their tummies. When an infant is 6 weeks old, Tracy Hogg suggests 2 practices: <b>cluster feeding</b> - feed her every 2 hours before bedtime AND <b>dream feeding</b> - nurse baby in her sleep right before you retire to bed. For example, you give baby the breast at 6 and 8 in the evening, and the dream feed at 10:30 or 11.</li>
<li style="text-align: left;"><b>If a pacifier isn't allowed to become a sleep prop, it can be very helpful in weaning a baby off the nighttime feed. </b>If a baby weighs 10 lbs. and he's getting between 6-8 breastfeedings, he doesn't need an additional night feeding for nourishment. If he's still waking, he's using the opportunity for oral stimulation. When he wakes up crying for the breast and yet he only feeds for 5 minutes, give him a pacifier instead. The first night, he'll probably stay up the entire 20 minutes with the pacifier in his mouth before falling back to sleep. The next night, it may cut back to 10 minutes. The third night, he might fidget in his sleep at the time he'd normally get up for the feed. If he wakes, give him the pacifier. Eventually, he won't wake up for it. </li>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #ffe599;">What They Need/What You Can Expect</span></div>
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<b>Age/Milestones Sleep Needed per Day Typical Patterns</b></div>
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Newborn 16-20 hours Nap 1 hour in every 3; 5-6 </div>
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hour stretch at night [wow,<br />
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Penny still gets up every 2-3] </div>
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1-3 Months: more alert, 15-18 hours, until 18 months 3 naps, 1.5 hours each; 8 hour</div>
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aware of their surroundings, stretch at night </div>
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able to move head</div>
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4-6 Months: Gaining mobility 2 naps, 2-3 hours each; 10-12 </div>
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hours at night </div>
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6-8 Months: More mobility, 2 naps, 1-2 hours each; 10-12 </div>
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able to sit and crawl hours at night</div>
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8-18 Months: Always in motion 2 naps, 1-2 hours each, or one </div>
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big nap 3 hours long; 12 hours </div>
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at night</div>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-66521386156644163272012-05-01T22:57:00.004-07:002015-06-16T22:53:28.016-07:00A Happy Couple's Secret Weapon...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<b>We're back from our vacation to Arches National Park in Moab, Utah and are so missing it!</b>... all of it except for the driving-little-children-straped-in-car-seats-for-way-too-long part! Man, it was rejuvenating to get away - just our own little family - and play together. Having a fresh re-charge is so healthy and absolutely necessary. We even got to camp along a sandy beach surrounded by gorgeous red rock. Camping with two littles also equated to our kids being perfectly toasty warm and us parents uncomfortably freezing all night :). And lack of good sleep typically equates grouchiness.. and on rare occasions a case of giggles. Luckily, I was in a continual giggly stage and everything Steve did or said was absolutely hilarious to me. We had SO MUCH FUN laughing together that next day. I re-discovered my love for the outdoors, AND I also re-discovered the <b>POWER of FRIENDSHIP </b>in marriage. Husbands and Wives <b>NEED to LAUGH</b> more and to enjoy more shared experiences. </div>
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John Gottman, well-renowned marriage therapist and researcher, wrote a great book entitled "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work." Gottman not only knows his stuff academically and professionally, but he also has witnessed what works and doesn't work in marriage from his prolific research in observing couples. In his introductory chapter he explains that <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394; font-size: x-large; font-weight: bold;">a "<u>happy</u> couple's secret weapon" is "rediscovering or reinvigorating friendship."</span></div>
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<b>THINK about WHAT HELPS CULTIVATE YOUR FRIENDSHIP? </b>Is it laughing together? thinking how your spouse sees love and then acting on that? feeling attractive for your hubby? serving others together? thinking what he needs and trying to help meet that need? going on a date just the two of you? Talking while giving back rubs? both of you feeling understood and validated? doing something fun together? ...</div>
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<b>Whatever it is for you, I encourage you to rediscover the friendship you once had with your spouse... for it is a happy couple's secret weapon.</b></div>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-53643513406944752722012-03-14T06:57:00.005-07:002015-06-18T20:07:24.022-07:00Exits & Entrances<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFrrBDkh_tnRv5TKTEb7QX3XhL7SoUgw39iqtZQA4EVOnx6gfxJY4JYgef4fUWO3HtlFJodUABJ4DQVWIOsqdOxraghu-S7wYWj9VsttC5-ReHjP4ZPbMfYNW2t5VNmwUxMEDjwzS8FgTZ/s1600/DSC_0257.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFrrBDkh_tnRv5TKTEb7QX3XhL7SoUgw39iqtZQA4EVOnx6gfxJY4JYgef4fUWO3HtlFJodUABJ4DQVWIOsqdOxraghu-S7wYWj9VsttC5-ReHjP4ZPbMfYNW2t5VNmwUxMEDjwzS8FgTZ/s640/DSC_0257.jpg" width="428" /></a></div>
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<span style="vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Last winter our 3-year old got into the habit of yelling “Don’t’ Slip!” each morning as my husband braved the snow and ice. Even in the hot summer months, she’d still race down the stairs to make sure to blurt out “Don’t Slip!” and throw her little arms tightly around his neck and touch thumbs while saying “BFF!” Once at the end of church one Sunday, our little daughter even yelled out “Don’t Slip!” to this 90-year old sweet woman with a walker and oxygen tank. It was an awesome moment.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px;"><span style="font-family: garamond, serif; font-size: medium;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></span></span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px;"><span style="font-family: garamond, serif; font-size: medium;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">And three little people with noses and eyes smashed up against the window are happily clamoring for Daddy as soon as the door swings open, even our little baby starts kicking and smiling! It’s like Christmas morning! And other days there are kicking and screaming all around as the door swings open. But… my kids inspire me to RE-DEDICATE MORE EFFORT AND ATTENTION AND EXCITEMENT TO OUR COMINGS AND GOINGS. </span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: garamond, serif; font-size: medium;"><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">Our good friend is getting his PhD in Marriage & Family therapy and he explained one of his professor's advice. This marriage professor said whenever he'd step through the door, their family dog would go crazy - </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">running around in circles, barking loudly, jumping up and down - that dog was so eager and excited for him to come home! In this professor's marriage they now have a joke about trying to </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"Beat the Dog,"</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">meaning they try to show even more excitement than the dog about each other's arrivals :).</span></span></div>
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<span style="vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Some days I am watching the clock and so ready for my husband to come home and rescue me! I often want to shove our cute kids into his arms and then fall down right there and sleep! Or maybe all the worries from work or the stresses of life bog you down during these critical, important moments when your paths cross. </span><br />
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<span style="vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: garamond, serif; font-size: medium;">Just think.. how can I make it special when my spouse and I meet up for the first time each day or say goodbye in the morning?</span></span></div>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-9051779389768546342012-03-09T13:55:00.000-08:002015-06-18T16:21:33.723-07:00The REAL Mother I've Become...<br />
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<b>Oh the days while pregnant with my first.</b> I just had graduated with my college degree in Child Development & Family Life! I scoured through books on sleep training to breastfeeding to learning how to become an official baby whisperer and "baby wise". My husband kindly sat through 20 painful hours of Hypnobirthing classes and practiced all the positions during our "Labor Relaxation course." I had him come to my lactation class, even though he was the only male in the whole room. I even had us become "Red Cross CPR/First Aid Certified" just to be prepared :). I can't even remember a thing we learned of course but just how we were the only ones there voluntarily! With tours of the hospital and the changing table all set out, I thought I was so ready to become a mother. <br />
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<b>Vivid in my mind were the expectations of what kind of mother I wanted to be.</b> A mother who...<br />
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actually got ready each day and looked super cute </div>
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had patience and strived to live in the moment </div>
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had a beautifully decorated home and cooked healthy, delicious meals </div>
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took her kids to the library each week and continually taught them in fun ways </div>
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wouldn't let my kids watch TV the first two years<br />
breastfed my babies at least 12 months :) </div>
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kept a consistent schedule and found time for personal fulfillment </div>
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had well-kept kids with clean clothes and combed hair.... the list goes on and on</div>
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<b>So here's a glimpse of what life has <i>really</i> been like this week...</b></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcdI0tOr4_4Z5rfez1Co6ifxCCQY5jdOQi9GBM9e4a7-I-Wf8_SPd1sU4MKW-Jbddjtl-p9PkBoZJnFRrRpsRG-PFQwq4LtqHTqIix-itiBZ6PYBzsFD1BYAY_e3em51VRUwZXs5v0NoPq/s1600/IMG_0393.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="264" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcdI0tOr4_4Z5rfez1Co6ifxCCQY5jdOQi9GBM9e4a7-I-Wf8_SPd1sU4MKW-Jbddjtl-p9PkBoZJnFRrRpsRG-PFQwq4LtqHTqIix-itiBZ6PYBzsFD1BYAY_e3em51VRUwZXs5v0NoPq/s320/IMG_0393.JPG" width="320" /></a>As I look around the room I see milk spills on the table from days ago, oozing laundry piles, a gross casserole dish that took every second of my "personal time" during naps, old diapers that oh-so-need-to-be-taken-out, dishes so high in our tiny sink that you can't even begin to wash them, never being able to find a pair of the same socks, and rice remnants scattered across the floor <i>because</i> Brayden played with a bucket of rice while I was desperately trying to "get something done" and our vacuum broke right in the middle of cleaning it up. We've watched Tangled for the upteenth time and Baby Einstein music is often ringing through my head. If I manage to take a shower, I don't always have time to do much makeup and I am lucky to find something to wear that's both cute and clean. Sometimes I worry that my toddler is going to turn into a giant cracker or a bag of fruit snacks since we are often on the go. The print out of our assignment to talk in church this Sunday (which I haven't begun yet) somehow got permanently laminated to our kitchen table. Which in a way is nice because I know I won't lose it! We're back in diapers after a day of attempting potty training, and we were late to "library toddler time" but at least we made it! About to run into the library, I quickly changed both kids diapers since thankfully our car is currently full of "treasures" and luckily extra diapers and wipes were included. I gagged, being a pregnant mommy, and hurriedly stashed Brayden's mother-of-all diapers under the car wheel to throw away later. As soon as I got home, I realized I forgot about that full diaper and drove right across it....<br />
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<b>You're either totally disgusted and horrified at reading this (and therefore feeling better about how great you're doing)... or you're thinking - "I'm not alone!"</b><br />
As soon as Brayden started to walk and play well on his own, I had a stage of time when the house was actually pretty clean and I felt somewhat in control! But then, we had another, and the seemingly eternal baby stage - incredibly cute yet greatly demanding - presses forward. <br />
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<b>I've learned that I'm far from that mother that I envisioned long ago, </b>yet I've also discovered that family life holds life's most supreme joys. I'm just completely tickled that my little lady just started walking and just beaming that Brayden can now say his entire ABCs!! Even though I'm often wiping noses and putting on the continual procession of meals, there's precious moments that make. everything. so. worth. it. <b>Strengthening our marriages and cherishing these beautiful children God has given us <i>really</i> is life's most astounding experience! I will never "have-it-all-together" but here are a few things I have found helpful:</b><br />
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1. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: purple;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>Focus on <i>your</i> STRENGTHS.</b> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> </span>Anna Quindlen said, "The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the wor<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">k of becoming yours<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; line-height: 21px;">elf." Each of us have unique gifts, I believe God-given gifts, that we can use to bless our families and the world around us. Your abilities will be different from the mothers on your street or in your churches, but deep down - you have special nobility and greatness within. Use <i>those</i> beautiful gifts right now and say "whatever" to the slew of abilities you currently covet. </span></span><br />
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2. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #38761d; font-size: large; font-weight: bold;">Trying to find ways to THRIVE, not just survive. </span> Don't you often feel like you are in "survival mode" especially while rearing lots of little ones?! Motherhood is a tremendously important and <i>selfless</i> work, but we need to remember who that <i>self</i> is. What are some basic needs you have... emotionally, mentally, spiritually, physically, and socially? See where you are struggling right now, and maybe pick <i>one or two things</i> this week to help take care of YOU. This can give you added energy and strength!<br />
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3. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><b>Daily vow "I'll TRY AGAIN tomorrow."</b></span> The beauty of life is we can keep <i>trying again</i>... we all lose our patience, we all have moments when we're not quick to forgive or be kind, we all face challenges. Gratefully, children are pretty resilient and we are continually growing and learning which is all part of the refining process of parenting! Good thing we get to go to sleep each night - even if we close our eyes with sorrow and regrets, we can wake up refreshed to try again. <br />
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4. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;"><b>PRACTICE CHERISHING the moment.</b></span> </span> Some moments are just exhausting and some moments frankly are boring at times. But, I believe in the POWER of REMINDING ourselves to get down on all fours, to look our precious children in the eyes, to drop what we are doing and completely give our whole selves to them, to find those teaching moments, to laugh so hard our bellies hurt, and to soak up all the love and complete joy we have for our precious children. We're definitely <i>not</i> going to "cherish" each day, BUT we can <i>practice</i> having <b>more and more</b> of those joyful moments. <br />
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*I'd love to keep writing to put off this mess that needs cleaning and to pour out my soul encouraging you in this most paramount work, but I'll just end with <b>one more thought:</b> Most likely you're not <i>always</i> the "mother" you once had envisioned, but YOU DO have GREATNESS within you. You're not alone in all the motherly mayhem - it is a pretty crazy life that we live :). But, it is also the greatest, most influential, most irreplaceable role on the entire planet. You can't ever do it all, but you can KEEP ON doing the things that matter most.<br />
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Much Love,<br />
MindyMindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-59783826741503687962012-03-07T12:50:00.002-08:002015-06-18T16:21:21.402-07:007 Motherhood Ideas that I LOVE!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I know I've told you already... but I adore this woman - Shawni - and the whole inspiring Eyre clan. <a href="http://www.71toes.com/2008/02/7-motherhood-ideas-i-love.html">CLICK HERE</a> to see her post <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"7 motherhood ideas that I love."</span> </b> Here are some fun ideas, most of wish I don't do now but dream to do in the future! <br />
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1. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;"><b><u>Movie Night</u></b>:</span> Each Friday night they pop popcorn, make chocolate-chip cookies, and watch a movie!<br />
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2. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;"><b><u>Interviews</u></b>:</span> Shawni's dad started a tradition of having a little one-on-one "interview" with each child once a week. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> She explains, "</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;">He'd ask all kinds of questions. He'd help us figure out our goals. When we were really little he'd write the initial of our best talents on each of our ten fingertips. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;">He'd make us feel so great about ourselves. He'd ask what he could help with.... [she goes on to share] </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;">This is a tough thing to carry on with my kids because I'm not anywhere near as organized or as amazing as my dad. But I do enjoy writing occasional letters on my kids' fingertips and I have cornered them for an 'interview' on occasion. This year I've decided to try to do interviews on our monthly lunch dates, which is the next idea..."</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;">3. <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;"><u>Lunch Dates</u>. </span></b> I LOVE, LOVE this idea for taking each child out of school lunch hour every now and then! Shawni tries to do once a month. Sure you may still have toddlers/babies tagging along, but it's still that child's "special day." They get to choose the fast food place and you get some essential one-on-one time! </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"> 4. <u><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;">Mother's Day Letters. </span></b></u> I too feel so passionately about record keeping, and I'm sure it will get even crazier and harder to keep up on it as we have more kids. I love writing them "notes" in their journals (of course not nearly as much as I would like!) of the strengths I see in them, of funny stories, and of how much I love the little things they do. Shawni started a tradition of asking for a few hours each Mother's Day to sit down and write each of her kids a "love note" where she writes "</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">how much I love them at every stage and what I've noticed about them each year."</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> These are precious letters to compile and keep forever!</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">5. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;"><u><b>Clean Ten. </b></u> </span>She says, "</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Whenever things get really cluttery...(ok, pretty much a few times a day) we just say "clean ten" and the kids have to each pick up and put away ten things."</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333;">6. </span><u><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;">Late Nights. </span></b></u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333;"> Shawni explains that "'Late Nights'</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> are when the kids get to rotate each getting a turn once a week to stay up ten or fifteen minutes later than the others. They eat this up. It's such a short amount of time, but they think it's the luckiest thing ever when it's their turn and we love to give them some undivided one-on-one attention."</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333;">7. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6; font-size: large;"><u><b>"Happies" & "Sads"</b></u></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333;"> At dinner time you each take turns saying your "happies" (best part of your day) and "sads" (worst moment of the day)! I've tried doing this at bedtime which can be fun too. She says it's a great way to get some details and more of a discussion than just describing their day as "fine" or "bad." LOVE ALL THESE IDEAS! THANKS TO SHAWNI!</span></span></span><br />
<br />Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-17200920003222412082012-02-16T11:17:00.000-08:002015-06-18T20:04:41.482-07:00On Days That Are Tough: LOVE is the ANSWER (and so are chocolates)<b>Today is one of those days. </b> You know the ones where you are just grouchy - and so are the kidlets. I can rate how my day is going depending on how many oreos I'm popping. Some moments we just <b>fill to the brim with frustration</b>. <b>Yet in those same challenging days, we have sweet, precious moments.</b> I just watched in awe as my cute dimpled red head toddled her very first steps. My little boy with tears in his eyes came running for a hug after he got corrected for spilling milk and food all over the "kitchen floor," which is actually carpet, bright purple carpet I might add :)! I loved snuggling up on the couch to read books and smiling at Bradyen blowing me lots of kisses as daddy carried him to bed. We want to be wonderful mothers who love our kids unconditionally and who teach them and cherish them! <b>We want that vision but somedays it can just</b> <b>seem so challenging when our patience and energy tank is on low</b>. What do we do when we have lots of little dependents needing every ounce of our time and attention? <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> </span><b style="font-size: x-large;">What do we do when the very kids we give our life to and love so dearly - drive us bonkers?! </b>I'm learning the key is to <b>LOVE MORE</b>.<br />
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<u>In those moments, sometimes I say in my mind this little poem/prayer I memorized:</u></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">A Mother's Prayer</span></b></div>
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O give me patience when tiny hands</div>
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Tug at me with their small demands.</div>
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Give me gentle and smiling eyes </div>
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and keep my lips from sharp replies.</div>
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Let not fatigue, confusion, or noise </div>
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Obscure my vision of life's fleeting joys.</div>
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For this love month, I've been reading <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"The Five Love Languages of Children"</span></b> by Chapman and Campbell. The five love languages being: quality time, gifts, service, words of affirmation, and touch. I've been so inspired by the emphasis how our children need to know of our <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">UNCONDITIONAL LOVE</span>. To experience our love in their understanding and <b>so very deeply that they don't doubt it - even when they are disciplined for misbehavior or they do things we don't like.</b> That's what Christ does - He corrects us because he loves us, and His love is always unconditional. Whew, I've sure got loads to learn, but I am grateful for this great refining journey!<br />
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Here are two of my <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">favorite quotes from the book</span>:<br />
"Unconditional love shows love to a child <i>no matter what</i>. We love regardless of what the child looks like; regardless of her assets, liabilities, or handicaps; regardless of what we expect her to be; and, most difficult of all, regardless of how she acts. This does not mean that we like all of her behavior.... <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><u>A child's emotional tank must be filled before any effective training or discipline can take place.</u>" </span></b> Oh and check out page 21 - LOVE this. <br />
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"Even if your child's primary love language is not quality time, many children [I would think most] crave the undivided attention of parents." Quality time "means giving a child your undivided attention.... Few of us have enough time to do everything we need and want to; giving a child quality time may mean that we must give up something high on our list of preferences. As children grow toward adolescence, they often require time just when we parents are exhausted, rushed, or emotionally out of sorts." Yet, giving of ourselves and our full attention "conveys this message: 'You are important. I like being with you.'" <br />
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This afternoon I let out a great sigh of relief and utter exhaustion... My two kids were finally down for naps! Wahoo! Being in my isolated quarters, I needed some help and to know that I wasn't alone, that other mothers know it's hard sometimes. So, I turned on a <a href="http://powerofmoms.com/2012/02/love-is-the-answer-episode-28/?utm_source=The+Power+of+Moms&utm_campaign=9e5a9f8ea4-2012_Feb_14_Newsletter2_14_2012&utm_medium=email"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">POWEROFMOMS.COM PODCAST</span></a> from Saren, Shawni, & Linda about how <b>"LOVE IS THE ANWSER"</b>. Here are just some ideas that really stood out to me:<br />
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<li>Convey "<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">I LIKE YOU</span>" (I like being with you. I like who you are) as well as "I love you" (because I'm your parent). </li>
<li>At night, watch your children's eyes light up as you talk about what good <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">THINGS YOU NOTICED</span> in them that day.</li>
<li>Set them aside somedays and write what they are good at - <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">ONE ON EACH FINGER</span>. So, if you think a child is good at doing flips on the tramp write "F" on one finger and "B" on another if they are good at babysitting!</li>
<li>"<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">LOVE MORE</span>." When a child is misbehaving, think - he needs more love and attention (perhaps more sleep/food too!)</li>
<li>Many times our immediate reaction is - you are driving me crazy! Or we just want to send them away. Yet, when they are the most irritating, that's when you <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">NEED TO LOVE THEM THE MOST.</span> </li>
<li>Explain <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">WHY WE DO NOT DO SOMETHING</span> - perhaps hit a sibling or take toys - because of LOVE. WE are a family. We love each other. Jesus taught us how to love. </li>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-33430584210095202672012-02-14T10:09:00.000-08:002015-06-18T16:33:51.883-07:00More LOVE in your MARRIAGE - ideas from a remarkable lady<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Ok, this woman - Shawni - is one of my greatest motherhood heros. I feel like I know her just for reading her book "A Mother's Book of Secrets" and many of her mother - Linda Eyre's - books which are amazing! I've never met her, but I do absolutely adore HER BLOG <a href="http://www.71toes.com/">www.71toes.com</a> Shawni puts her husband FIRST and that tremendously blesses her marriage and her children. I love how hilariously down to earth she is and at the same time incredibly inspiring. Her website would be definitely worth your time. For Valentine's Day, here's some of HER LIST of how to show your husband you LOVE HIM:<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><span style="font-size: 26px;">Go to bed at the same time</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;">(I know this doesn't work for everyone, but it makes a world of difference for us.)</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">If you go to bed at the same time, you get to have</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><span style="font-size: 19px;">"pillow talk"</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">which leads to belly laughs, which make me happy.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">Find at least a few of the same things to be <span style="font-size: 19px;">interested in </span><span style="font-size: 19px; font-style: italic;">together</span>.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">Never underestimate the <span style="font-size: 26px;">power of touch</span>. Even just a touch on the shoulder or a on his knee at dinner.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">Tell your kids how excited you are to </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">go on a date together</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;"> with</span><span style="font-size: 19px;"> stars in your eyes</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: 26px;">Hug</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;"> in front of your kids.</span><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 19px;"><br /></span><br /><span style="font-size: 19px;">Continue <span style="font-size: 33px;">"dating"</span> regularly forever</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">, even if it's an "at-home date" after the kids are in bed.</span><br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">Drop everything you're trying to juggle some evenings and just </span><span style="font-size: 26px;">snuggle on the couch</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">.</span><br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">Watch a show you like together while sitting in front of him on the floor...he rubs your back while you </span><span style="font-size: 26px;">rub his feet</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">. (or visa-versa)</span><br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;">Text him </span><span style="font-size: 26px;">love-notes</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px;"> in the middle of the day.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">Make an effort to give him a sincere <span style="font-size: 26px;">compliment</span> before you go to bed each night...something you noticed during the day. Be looking for the good instead of for opportunities to nag.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><span style="font-size: 26px;">Laugh.</span> A lot. Keep a sense of humor.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;">Someday, I want to do what Shawni does the month of February. They decorate and write on hearts reasons they love each member of the family. Then, they post those hearts up to enjoy the whole month! Brilliant!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: small; line-height: normal;"></span></span>Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-90997310891192963572012-02-09T12:04:00.000-08:002015-06-21T18:28:14.976-07:0050 WAYS to Show Your Husband You LOVE HIM<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: #e06666; font-size: x-large;"><a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/the-little-things/50-ways-to-show-love1" style="background-color: #ea9999;">This post is now also found on NURTURINGMARRIAGE.ORG which is an inspiring place full of awesome ideas to help improve your marriage!</a></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/the-little-things/50-ways-to-show-love1"><img border="0" height="310" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhb5Gh0X3J9XQNScGS9-ZZ2kKgG4rHZV5w7jUQMH6NVY0Q2q0ORG3U9mHa-0MMw7vSAQMKGHzyej9hMKEVQjm0se0p5GKhQJ8idzEdYH967ACo_BM2d4ZmrFo9Ua_ymbRAzECGnMnelMslI/s640/Screen+shot+2015-06-19+at+2.39.30+PM.png" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/the-little-things/50-ways-to-show-love1">Don't worry... you don't need to do all 50 :). And some of these ideas won't apply to your situation in life. But, I hope this list inspires you to just try ONE and re-focus on the person you love! I think it's so easy, with the stresses of parenting or working or life, to neglect giving daily love and attention to our <u>most important relationship</u> on earth. In marriage, we are completely known for <i>who we are</i> and our spouses get our best and our very worst. Luckily we can continually learn and grow as a person and a couple. Being married to my very best friend is the biggest blessing in life!!</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/the-little-things/50-ways-to-show-love1">If you ever feel that your marriage could be stronger or you feel your relationship needs a re-charge (<b>which is always does</b>), <b>pick one that works for you and have fun</b>!! <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I so believe that discovering ways to <i>show love</i> in <i>YOUR SPOUSE'S LANGUAGE </i>and re-discovering your FRIENDSHIP over and over again is what builds a strong marriage! </span>So I hope one idea may help...</a></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>1. Choose to act, not re-act. </strong></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Isn't it so natural to react to others, to become offended when someone is offensive?! To mentally blow up your spouse's faults to justify your "better," standing? To reflect shortness to someone's being short or irritable? You cannot ever change others, but you have the power to choose how you act and how you love. <br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">2. Be the first to change. </strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">My husband and I once heard the advice to look into a “mirror,” when there’s any particular marriage issue…definitely NOT in an effort to blame yourself, but to ask yourself, “How can <i>I</i> change or make things better?” Or, “What can <i>I </i>do differently?” Really, you are the only thing you can control, and your efforts can and may inspire your spouse.<br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">3. Flirt with each other. </strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">It's funny how we totally flirt while dating, but once we're married we can easily forget to be fun with each other! Just because you've snagged him or her, <a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/intimacy/get-your-flirt-on" style="color: #5199a8; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">don't stop flirting</a>. Try to bring it back :). <br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">4. Laugh more.</strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Remember when you were dating and you laughed about everything? We all can get into a rut and forget to have fun, but we need to be able to laugh at ourselves, and to not be so serious all the time. The other night, my husband and I were bantering and laughing, and I caught a glimpse of my son’s wide eyes and sheepish smile. Children secretly light up inside when they see their parents laugh and connect!<br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">5. Text each other.</strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Surprise him with a spontaneous, flirty text, or a sentence about why you are so grateful for her. Finding small ways to connect during the day makes a difference.<br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">6. Initiate intimacy.</strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Through extensive research and experience in married couples therapy, Dr. Willard Harley discussed the top 10 marital needs in his book "His Needs. Her Needs." The needs that women rated as their top 5 were typically men's bottom 5, and vice versa. Harley explains that the marital need of "sexual fulfillment" doesn't necessarily mean just quantity, but even more - quality. Interestingly, men feel</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">most</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">fulfilled and loved</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">only</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">when they feel their spouse is also desiring and also fulfilled. Dr. Harley counsels wives in therapy to discover how they personally can enjoy intimacy more and more, prepare for it, and</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">especially</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">choose to</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">initiate</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>7. </strong></span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Offer praise and show appreciation.</strong></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">When your husband or wife works hard, or does something for you, let him or her know you appreciate them! Everyone desires to feel understood and valued. In a moment where you could become frustrated, first think of something you could be grateful for in your spouse. Interestingly, researchers have found that "praise and appreciation" are actually one of men’s </span><a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/needs-of-men-vs-women.html" style="color: #5199a8; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">top five needs</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">in marriage.</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><br /><br /><strong>8. Drop everything. </strong></span><br />
<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Try putting aside your eternal to-do lists just for a moment, and give your husband or wife your sincere, undivided attention.</span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>9. Start a hobby together.</strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">With our babies asleep at home one night, we decided to write a “bucket list” of fun things we wanted to do together. We love rock-climbing, so we've started buying the gear. Find something you both would enjoy!</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">10. Read a book together.</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"> </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;" />
<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">11. Plan a date night.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Even if it is in your own home, when the kiddos are asleep (but I love it when we actually leave the house!). If you need </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">some fun </span><a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2012/10/date-night-ideas.html" style="color: #5199a8; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">date night</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> </span><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">ideas, click here. It’s so important to have that time to fall in love all over again - just the two of you. Find what works for you, and maybe even officially </span><a href="http://www.nurturingmarriage.org/date-night/why-you-should-still-ask-your-spouse-out-on-dates" style="color: #5199a8; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">ask each other out!</a><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>12. True love is never about you. </strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #626262; font-size: 20px;">I love the articl</span><span style="color: #666666; font-size: 20px;">e </span><span style="color: #45818e;"><a href="http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/">"<span id="goog_1359093679"></span>Marriage Isn't for You<span id="goog_1359093680"></span>" </a></span><span style="color: #626262; font-size: 20px;">where we learn "you marry to make someone else happy." How can you build, and serve, and add to the happiness and well-being of your spouse? </span></span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">13. Feel beautiful.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Trying to oversee that four people get their teeth brushed, clothes on, hair done, and tummies fed means it’s easy for me to get last pickings on personal time. One day with all my little buddies finally strapped in car seats, we made it all the way to the store before I realized I forgot my own shoes! However, I have made it my New Year’s resolution wife-goal to somehow find a way to feel more beautiful for my husband, because it seriously makes such a difference to me.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">14. Remember the "real" golden rule.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">In marriage, it’s not just treating your spouse the way you want to be treated, but meeting their needs in the way they want. This takes lots of time, practice, trying and understanding - over and over again.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">15. Make a surprise breakfast. </strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">16. Say you are sorry (sincerely).</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Say you are sorry even before your spouse does, and irregardless of whether he/she gives an apology, too. I love the quote by Ruth Bell Graham, "A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers."</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;" />
<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">17. Remember the power of touch.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Spontaneously decide to dedicate an entire day to as many random acts of physical touch as possible… back scratches, hugging while talking, touches in passing, etc. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">18. Write a fun love note.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Maybe a "Top 10 Things I Love about My Wife," on the bathroom mirror, or post-it notes or a letter thrown in his car, or on the bedroom door. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">19. Light candles and give each other massages.</strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">20. Grab a kiss while you wait. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Kiss your husband or wife while you're waiting at the stoplight, or in the food drive-through, or at the grocery store...just because.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">21. Remember the power of exits and entrances.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">As you and your spouse say goodbye's and reunite again after a long day, be aware of how you show love during these important </span><a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2012/03/to-those-who-get-your-very-best-and.html" style="color: #5199a8; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">cross roads. </a><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">22. Take interest in each other's interests.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Doesn’t it make you feel close to someone when they take a keen interest in what you love?! If it matters to your spouse, then it should matter to you because you love them. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">23. Dance together. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Dance in the kitchen, in the parking lot, under the stars, in your home, anywhere... as long as you both would enjoy that.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">24. Verbally show appreciation for your spouse in front of your family and friends. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">When with his family, for example, share real sincere appreciation for what your husband does or who he is. When you are around her friends, mention something specific you love about her.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">25. Buy or make a surprise gift.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Surprise her with a fun gift that she would really enjoy. Or save the money and don't buy anything, if that's his love language! </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtSC-NQPBu-mC9fpGONf1qim2xaOzmAfHcgFR6bYId2RRt2qNB1g5mRgzLS8gXa77J8HadlN5QQZoP5vSAOqU26xIGo-aF-cJCiYdoY3q_twQj2_9CRLhb6Lzx95E5mo2t5NLzRbxUyHS-/s1600/9931653_orig.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtSC-NQPBu-mC9fpGONf1qim2xaOzmAfHcgFR6bYId2RRt2qNB1g5mRgzLS8gXa77J8HadlN5QQZoP5vSAOqU26xIGo-aF-cJCiYdoY3q_twQj2_9CRLhb6Lzx95E5mo2t5NLzRbxUyHS-/s640/9931653_orig.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">26. Find some sanity at home.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">No matter how much we all work together on cleaning and organizing our house, it usually feels so overwhelming. I do care about the environment of our home because it does affect everyone, especially me and my ability to focus more on relationships. I've also found that cleaning together as a couple can also be a good time to chat. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">27. Encourage his hobbies.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">It will make a huge difference, and help him to feel more balanced, and to be his best self. I sure need this, and I know he does too.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">28. Take a hike or walk, while holding hands. </strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">29. Eat an ice cream cone together.</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Buy one large cone and eat it together at the same time.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">30. Pray together each night. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Recently I attended a wedding ceremony where I heard some of the best marriage advice, it was this, "As you are praying together, express 1) something you love/appreciate about your spouse and 2) what you personally want to work on (to improve yourself)." If you're not a praying couple, you could just verbalize this to each other.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">31. Have a wrestling match.</strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">32. Exercise together. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">One time, while doing a P90x workout, my husband caught me drinking milk during a "water break"... and dunking Oreos.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">33. Cuddle while watching a movie. </strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">34. Make his favorite treat. </strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">35. Play a game together.</strong><br />
<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">I kind of pride myself on being undefeated in Settler's...</span><br />
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<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>36. Look in her eyes.</strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Try looking your wife straight in the eyes when she talks to you, to show her that she is your number one at that moment. Walking over to her and being close helps you be more focused on her, and helps to show you care.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">37. Stick to the budget the two of you have worked out. </strong><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">38. </strong><strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Let her sleep in. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Your wife probably seems to be the one who is always getting up with the kids, or getting up before you do. Let her sleep in from time to time. She will love you for it. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">39. Smile. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Sometimes we are so bombarded with what we are doing we forget to smile. When your spouse is around or walks in the room, try smiling more.</span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">40. </strong><strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Cook her favorite meal. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Even if you don't know how to cook very well. Do a little research, call your mom, and surprise her with a special meal. It will mean a lot to her. </span><br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">41. </strong><strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Say, "I love you," in creative ways. </strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">It's easy to say the words "I love you," but it is way more fun to leave those words for your spouse to find in creative ways. Spell it out with cereal, with lipstick on the bathroom mirror, or little game pieces while you're playing a board game.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">42. Offer to help. </strong><br />Your husband or wife has a kajillion things going on and it never hurts to take him or her by the shoulders and just say, "What can I do to help?"<br /><br /><strong style="font-size: 20px;">(#43-#45 </strong></span><em style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; position: relative; text-align: justify;"><strong>come from the book "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by Dr. John Gottman, who has revolutionized the study of marriage.)</strong></em><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>43. </strong></span><strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Soften your startup.</strong><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">John Gottman wrote "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work," and his</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">research shows that “discussions invariably end on the same note they begin. … If you start an argument harshly – meaning you attack your spouse verbally – you’ll end up with at least as much tension as you began. But if you use a softened startup – meaning you complain but don’t criticize or otherwise attack your spouse – the discussion is likely to be productive."<br /><span style="font-size: 20px;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><strong>44. Enhance your "love map."</strong></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Dr. Gottman </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">describes how couples need a "richly detailed love map," which means continually seeking to understand your spouse's current needs, stresses, worries, friends, thoughts, hopes, and dreams. We need to better understand how our spouses really perceive love. </span><a href="https://s3.amazonaws.com/moody-profiles/uploads/profile/attachment/5/CHP_5LoveLanguagesCouples_Quiz_Rev3-26.pdf" style="background-color: white; color: #5199a8; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank" title="">Here's the link to take the 5 Love Languages Quiz.</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> It also goes deeper and more personalized than that, so keep exploring what helps you feel most connected and loved!</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><br /></span><br />
<strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">45. Nurture your fondness & admiration.</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;">Every now and then, stop yourself and just dwell on </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; position: relative; text-align: justify;">all</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> the things you spouse </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; position: relative; text-align: justify;">does</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> do, and all the little things you </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; position: relative; text-align: justify;">do</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; text-align: justify;"> admire about him/her. As you do this, your tender appreciation grows, and these inner feelings affect how you interact and treat your spouse. Just as people choose to dwell on their frustrations, "nurturing fondness," is also a choice.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;" />
<strong style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato;">46. Sometimes j</span></strong><strong style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">ust go to bed!</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">We don’t always believe in the adage to "never go to bed angry." Our kids sure struggle when they are overtired, and so do we. In a moment of frustration, when tired and cranky, sometimes it is best just to go to bed. You'll likely wake up in the morning with a renewed perspective! </span><br />
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<strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">47. Turn towards each other rather than away.</strong><br />
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<strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">48. </strong><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;"> </span><strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Inspire the best in each other.</strong></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Choose to see the immense good in the other and treat each other as such. You are your spouses greatest supporter, and as you believe in him/her, they will aspire to really become that. Tell him or her today one great attribute you see!</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">49. </strong><strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">Hold your wife close.</strong><br />
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<span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato;"><span style="font-size: 20px;">Sometimes just hold your wife close, let her cry to you, let you unload all her feelings, tell her that your love for her and your relationship is more important than any problem to be solved. If you spouse is inwardly hurt and being hurtful, sometime hold him and show an outpouring of love.</span></span></div>
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<strong style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato; font-size: 20px; text-align: justify;">50. See your spouse as a person. </strong><br />
<span style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato;"><span style="font-size: 20px;">Sometimes we can view those closest to us as objects to blame or criticize. Remember that your spouse is a person, a part of you, that has real concerns and needs just as legitimate and important as your own! </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #626262; font-family: Lato;"><span style="font-size: 20px;">I hope we all can be filled with hope and charity and seek to just make ONE small step and change for the better! </span></span></span></div>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-72899518833349275652012-01-01T17:55:00.000-08:002015-06-01T21:45:16.616-07:00What Heaven Sees in YouToday in Young Women's, the Beehive teacher (Lesa, I love you!) taught the lesson about how <b>we are daughters of God.</b> As she played this <b>video slideshow "What Heaven Sees in You,"</b> it brought me back to <b>a flood of feelings</b>. I know that we lived with God before coming to earth and there we grew so close to our Heavenly Father and we stood valiantly in testifying of Jesus Christ and also of our true identity and purpose. I was shocked to see <b>one of my bridal pictures in this video</b> - how funny! <br />
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<b>Life as a woman is so beautiful and rewarding, but it is also super challenging at times. </b>Some suffer through miscarriage, others long to be married, all seek to understand their personal gifts and how to contribute, some go through divorce or losing a loved one physically or spiritually, others who are mothers want to pull out their hairs in frustration or worries at times. <b>I think the purpose of life is to have relationships, while going through trials and also much happiness, and to therefore rediscover our relationship with God. </b>Whatever myriad of struggles we may be currently facing, there is hope and personal revelation from a loving, all-knowing, all-powerful Heavenly Father who has provided a Savior and the Spirit to comfort and guide us at every moment. <br />
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In the midst of motherly mayhem, we can find ourselves in a rut, at times totally worn out and discouraged. But, <b>we were born to do this</b>, even before we came to this earth, to have family experiences and to raise these special children of Heavenly Father. He knows us and knows our struggles and needs. <b>I know as we turn to Heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ that we will receive the forgiveness, the grace, and the vision to fulfill this most important work - each with our unique strengths! </b> <b>When I lose my patience and perspective, I LOVE re-watching this video over and over again! </b> ...<br />
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<br />Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-15525888452529773282011-12-05T22:47:00.001-08:002011-12-09T09:48:51.648-08:00Shutterfly GOSPEL ABC BOOK - ready to order!<object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab" height="425" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://images-community.shutterfly.com/flashapps/slideshow/slideshow-ui.swf"/>
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<a href="http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=0Abs2zJw5csmToY&eid=115">Click here to view this photo book larger</a></div>
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Select directly above "Click here to view this photo book larger" if you'd like <b>to order this ABC book to interest your children during sacrament meeting - or to teach them on any day of the week!</b> Next on the right hand side you'll login with your info and then select "Save this photo book." Finally, you can quickly edit anything you'd like. <b>You would need to add your own personalized pictures for the "E" and "F" pages. </b>When ordering, I selected a <b>"hard cover"</b> so it would last. Just fyi, it's not like I get any money for people ordering it! This just took me a long time to make, so I hope it may save someone else time. Hope it helps!</div>
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To see another post about surviving sacrament meeting and Sabbath Day ideas with kids <a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/surviving-sacrament-meeting-sabbath.html">CLICK HERE</a>!Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-46828774261147300302011-12-04T18:50:00.001-08:002015-06-01T21:45:42.181-07:00Life-Changing Pancakes!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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You HAVE to try this pancake mix. Other moms have told me that it changes their life and they can never eat other pancakes ever again :) I whip up a ton of mix (it has healthy whole wheat flour and oatmeal) and Brayden eats these pretty much every other day. SO YUMMY! I got the recipe from Melskitchencafe.com and we have altered it to be even more amazing... she suggests using buttermilk or a plain yogurt/milk combo, but I've tried it and vanilla yogurt makes ALL the difference. The type of vanilla yogurt even matters... <u>Dannon Light & Fit vanilla</u> has been the best. I haven't experimented with using coconut oil yet but please do share if that works well! <br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>Oatmeal Pancake Mix</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">*Makes 10 cups of dry mix<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">*1 cup of mix will make pancakes to feed 1 adult and 1-2 kids (about 6 pancakes)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">3 1/2 cups rolled (quick) oats<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">2 cups all-purpose flour<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1 tablespoon salt<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1 cup canola oil<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Mix all the dry ingredients together in a mixer with a paddle (or by hand). With mixer on slow speed (or gently by hand), drizzle the vegetable oil into the bowl slowly while the mixer is running. When all the oil has been added, stop the mixer and squeeze a clump of mix in your hand. If it stays together, it is just right. If it is still crumbly, add another tablespoon of oil at a time until the consistency is correct. Store in an airtight container for up to two weeks at room temperature or indefinitely in the refrigerator or freezer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">To make the pancakes: whisk together 1 cup of mix, 1/2 c. vanilla yogurt (I have found that a thick constancy works well like "Dannon Light & Fit vanilla",1/2 c. milk, and 1 egg. The mixture may seem thin at first but the oats will soak up the milk as it stands - let it stand for about 5 minutes. Heat a griddle around 325 degrees and drop the batter onto it. Enjoy!!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">*Some have added mashed bananas, vanilla, and cinnamon... YUM!</span><br />
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-28093918955943163072011-11-09T16:12:00.000-08:002012-02-25T08:53:29.429-08:007 Principles for Making Marriage WORK!<b><u><br /></u></b><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"><b><u>#1 Enhance Your "Love Map"</u></b></span></div>
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f85zkmJ7KGM/TrtdzYlfD8I/AAAAAAAABQI/ykxaqM9vwdI/s1600/5_love_languages.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><img border="0" height="217" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f85zkmJ7KGM/TrtdzYlfD8I/AAAAAAAABQI/ykxaqM9vwdI/s320/5_love_languages.jpg" width="320" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Dr. John Gottman describes how couples need a "richly detailed love map" which means continually seeking to understand your spouses current needs, stresses, worries, friends, thoughts, hopes, dreams ... </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Try to better understand how you and your spouse perceive love.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><u><a href="http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/">CLICK HERE</a></u></b> to take a quick, free online <b>QUIZ</b> to assess your <b>TOP LOVE LANGUAGES</b> (words, physical touch, service, quality time, gifts) </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><u>#2 Nurture Your Fondness & Admiration</u></b></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Write a list of 10 things you really LOVE about your spouse! I surprised Steve with this list taped onto our door. Brayden <i>had</i> to draw a picture for Daddy on the back :) I'm definitely pasting this into our<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: purple;"> </span><a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/love-journal.html" style="color: #cc0000;">"love journal"</a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;">!</span></span></div>
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<b><u>#3 Turn Towards Each Other Instead of Away</u></b><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;">I joke with Steve that marriage is </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"><b>one continual blabbing session</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;">- where you hopefully do want to hear what the other person has to say! It's the</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"><b>day to day connections,</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;">even seemingly mundane shared moments, that form a deep, solid friendship. As soon as the kids are asleep or even as soon as Steve gets home, I feel the</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;"><i>window of freedom and wonder </i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate;">of all the many things I could actually finally do... and I find it tempting to go do my own thing. Which, can be find and dandy at times.</span><br />
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But I've also discovered the <b>beauty of turning towards my husband</b> and giving him my undivided attention, laughing with him, connecting with him even about our most random or profound ideas.</div>
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We need to remember that WE (both spouses) are on the same team, we fight for each other, we support and encourage one another, we believe in each other. When you start to notice an emotion that would propel you to turn away - remind yourself - that your husband is your very best friend who does in fact love you. <b>When a dispute comes up... test yourself. Try to be willing in that very moment to put away your pride and selfishness and apparent hurt AND TURN TOWARD YOUR HUSBAND in humility and kindness.</b></div>
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<b><u>#4 Let Your Partner Influence You </u></b></div>
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At the heart of many marital issues is <b>self-centeredness</b> which can show its face in a myriad of ways: feeling victimized, blaming others, clinging to pride, acting defensive, seeing only self needs, unwilling to change...</div>
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<b>One uncomfortable aspect in marriage is we are completely vulnerable with all our strengths and also our greatest weaknesses exposed - we are known as we are. </b> But when there's an atmosphere of love and kindness and respect, we can have the greatest amount of growth in such a relationship. As we begin to identify in the moment when we are contributing to negative interaction, then we can see our need for change and for Christ. I love how the Bible Dictionary defines "repentance" as a "change of mind" and a "turning of the heart and will to God"! <b>The more we accept Christ into our lives, the more we can be open and let our partner and our relationship influence us for the better! </b></div>
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<u>BEST chapter I’ve ever read on MARRIAGE: <b>#5 Solve Your Solvable Problems</b></u></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DhCJ2g8715I/Tr12uyDZ3PI/AAAAAAAABRQ/thFkEUy6O_k/s1600/DSC_0267.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DhCJ2g8715I/Tr12uyDZ3PI/AAAAAAAABRQ/thFkEUy6O_k/s1600/DSC_0267.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DhCJ2g8715I/Tr12uyDZ3PI/AAAAAAAABRQ/thFkEUy6O_k/s320/DSC_0267.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="249" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>Every marriage has conflicts</b> – <b>even extremely happily married couples.</b> But, we all handle conflicts differently. Some people get silently angry while others have screaming matches. Some conflicts result in feeling closer to each other through working through it together while other conflicts leave us feeling distanced from our spouses. Some people try to avoid confrontation while others bring it on. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Marriage therapists typically teach couples to resolve conflicts by: trying to see the others’ point of view, listening intently, and communicating empathetically. This is a good method; however, Dr. Gottman interestingly found that <b>“many couples can’t – including many very happily married couples… But they were still able to resolve their conflicts.</b>” From the plethora of couples he did observe through his “love lab” research center, <b>he discovered what these happily married couples DID DO:</b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1. <u style="font-weight: bold;">SOFTEN YOUR STARTUP:</u></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Gottman’s research shows that “discussions invariably end on the same note they begin. … If you start an argument harshly – meaning you attack your spouse verbally – you’ll end up with at least as much tension as you began. But if you use a softened startup – meaning you complain but don’t criticize or otherwise attack your spouse – the discussion is likely to be productive. And if most of your arguments start softly, your marriage is likely to be stable and happy.”</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span></div>
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<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><i>Avoid criticism & contempt</i></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> (which is in anger, globally attacking or blaming your spouse's character or personality rather just the issue at hand)</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><i>Think before you speak:</i></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> “If you are angry with your spouse, it’s worth taking a deep breath and thinking through how to broach the subject before leaping in.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">It will be easier to do this if you constantly remind yourself that by being gentle, you are more likely to resolve the conflict.”</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">You may need to wait to discuss until you have calmed yourself down and are ready to discuss kindly and without attack.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><i>Be appreciative:</i></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> “If your partner has, at some point, handled this situation better, then couch your request WITHIN an appreciation of what your partner did right in the past.”</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><i>Shared humor</i></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> in the midst of conflict deescalates tension and helps couples feel “positive about themselves and their marriage.” </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><i>Don’t store things up.</i></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">“It’s hard to be gentle when you’re ready to burst… so don’t wait too long before bringing up an issue – otherwise it will just escalate in your mind.”</span></li>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">2. <u style="font-weight: bold;">MAKE & RECEIVE “REPAIR ATTEMPTS”:</u></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">When learning to drive, the first thing you learn is how to stop the car. In our marriage, we also need to learn how to <b><i>“put on the breaks”</i></b> when a discussion starts on the wrong foot and we find ourselves in escalated negativity. <b><i><a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/am-i-always-nice-happy.html">CLICK HERE</a></i></b> to learn about essential “repair attempts.” </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">3. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">COMPROMISE:</u></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> “Negotiation is possible ONLY after you’ve followed the steps above…. These prime you for compromise by getting you into a POSITIVE [and open] mode.” </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">4. <u style="font-weight: bold;">BE ACCEPTING OF EACH OTHER’S FAULTS:</u> “Too often, a marriage gets bogged down in ‘if onlies’…. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Until you accept your partner’s flaws and foibles [and yes we ALL have them], you will not be able to compromise successfully. … Conflict resolution is not about one person changing, it’s about negotiating, finding common ground and ways that you can accommodate each other.”</span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-536IUCHR7a8/Tr14YhaPoPI/AAAAAAAABRY/ihoEQJfAtac/s1600/la_01lsd_300.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-536IUCHR7a8/Tr14YhaPoPI/AAAAAAAABRY/ihoEQJfAtac/s200/la_01lsd_300.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="135" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><i><b>REMEMBER</b></i>: It’s not so much what you say exactly that matters. People really respond to the emotion and intent behind your words and actions. That’s why working on your overt communication skills is not enough – you have to go deeper and look at the condition of your heart towards your spouse in a particular incidence. And the BEST self-help book about this is "Leadership & Self-Deception" by the Arbinger Institute. It will totally change you and your marriage!</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I AM SO GRATEFUL to have found my very BEST FRIEND!!! I feel like the luckiest girl in the ENTIRE world to have him as my husband! And, I hope you feel that way too about your spouse :)</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b><u>#6 Overcome Gridlock</u></b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Both the government :) and marriages deal with "gridlock" issues. Dr. Gottman explains that <b>every couple has certain issues that seem unsolvable because of differences.</b> He says, "The goal in ending gridlock is not to solve the problem, but rather to move from gridlock to <b>dialogue</b>. The <b>gridlocked conflict will probably always be a perpetual issue in your marriage, but one day you will be able to talk about it without hurting each other</b> [meaning emotional pain or offense]. You will learn to live with the [issue]."</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">"<b>Acknowledging and respecting each other's deepest, most personal hopes and dreams</b> is the key to saving and enriching your marriage."</span></div>
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<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">For a certain issue, explain each of your desires and dreams</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">What are the few things that are your "non-negotiable" items</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Define your areas of flexibility</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Devise a temporary compromise that honors both of your needs/desires </span></li>
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<b><u>#7: Create Shared Meaning</u></b></div>
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After a stretch of stressful and busy weeks, at times it can seem that you and your spouse live parallel lives. With tending the children, doing the dishes, working long hard hours at school or work, folding the laundry, fulfilling your callings... at times we all feel the need to better re-connect with our spouses!</div>
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<b>As a couple, ASK YOURSELVES: </b></div>
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Here we are at a BYU service activity back in the day :)</div>
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<li><b>What are the values that mean the most to us? How can we better set goals to make those things happen?</b> (For example, Steve and I really enjoying doing various service projects together when we were dating. After being married for a while, we felt that void because it had been a while since we had intentionally thought of someone we could help. We grow so close together as we serve together. Or for another example, it's really important to us that we stay physically fit, but we have a hard time making it happen! So, just tonight, we were brainstorming how we can better support each other in exercising.)</li>
<li><b>What family rituals do we already have that create shared meaning, and how can we implement more?</b> Examples: eating dinner together, reading scriptures/praying together, going to church together, Christmas/Thanksgiving traditions, date nights, early to bed/early to rise, surprising each other, taking care of each other when sick, weekend rituals, vacations, temple attendance...</li>
<li><b>Think, what did we LOVE to do when we were dating, and how can we do some of those things now?</b></li>
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<a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/exits-entrances.html">CLICK HERE</a> to read about ideas to enrich the important <b>exits and entrances </b>in your marriage! </div>
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<a href="http://busybliss.blogspot.com/2011/11/date-night-ideas.html">CLICK HERE</a> to get ideas for your next <b>date night</b>!</div>
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</div>Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2651252734091293279.post-14709149161878261022011-11-03T11:08:00.003-07:002015-06-20T12:01:27.746-07:00Needs of Men vs. Women<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Dr. Stephen E. Lamb (Marriage, Family Therapist, author, and researcher) gave an amazing lecture on marriage. He referenced these lists (based off research from Dr. Harley's book "His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage) of the top 5 marital needs of Men and Women, which I thought were very interesting. Figure out what you think both of your top 5 needs are - I bet you would have an interesting conversation!</div>
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<b>Women’s Expectations/Needs in Marriage:</b></div>
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<li style="text-align: left;">Affection</li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Conversation</li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Trust & fidelity</li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Financial security</li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Family commitment</li>
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<b>Men’s Expectations/Needs in Marriage:</b></div>
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<li>Sexual Fulfillment</li>
<li>Recreational companionship</li>
<li>Attractive wife</li>
<li>Domestic support</li>
<li>Praise and admiration (appreciation)</li>
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Mindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13039146709039243320noreply@blogger.com4